I Can't Decide

Chapter 1: Conflicted Lovers

     It was a warm summer afternoon. The smell of the city was shut out by the scent of new flowers, a sign of life. In the middle of all this, were two bees, in the eye of a hurricane. Barry whispered Adam's name. Barry looked into his eyes, he sighed contentedly. Adam touched Barry-kun's hand, and stared at him intently.

"I want your honey, honey," Barry breathed out. He then asked an important question. "Ya like jazz?"

Adam looked uncomfortable,"But what about Vanessa?"

Barry narrowed his eyes, "We don't speak of her."

Adam looked confused,"Barry-kun. Do you like... me?"

Barry looked away from his friend,"I love you Adam."

Barry didn't know, but Adam remembered. He remembered Vanessa sharing that cake, in both ways. Adam saw what was in his eyes. Had Barry ever shown that love to him? Cold began to spread throughout Adam. Barry showed so much love to Vanessa and what was Adam? A secret? A toy?

Adam had tears in his eyes now. "Barry! If you loved me, why didn't you tell me that before now? You.. You shared that with her, but not with me!"

Barry looked at the ground, "I'm so sorry... she is nothing compared to you."

As Barry touched Adam's arm lightly, Adam shivered and hunched in on himself, "I c-can't Barry."

Barry stared at Adam, "Adam please," he smiled hopelessly.

"Barry, this-this isn't right!"

"Who cares what's right Adam! I love you and that's all I care about." Barry began to plead.

"Now...Let me show you that love," Barry's voice dropped.

Adam's stinger twitched and his breath hitched, " Barry-Chan! I-no, we can't!"

Barry held Adam's chin and kissed him to keep him from talking. At first Adam struggled, but melted under Barry's touch.

Vanessa was admiring flowers in the park when she saw this horrid discourse going on in the flowerbeds.

"Barry!" she screamed, shock filling her face.

Barry and Adam broke apart, pollen flying everywhere.

"Vanessa! It...It's not what you think!" Barry screamed.

Adam's eyes widened in shock. Was Barry lying to him? Adam stared at Barry. He was confused. His only friend had betrayed him.

"Barry-kun? What's going on? What about what you just told me? D-did you forget?"

Barry's mind was whirling. He loved...Both. Both Vanessa and Adam were pelting questions angrily. Barry covered his face with his hands.

"Stop!" Barry yelled.

"Why?" they questioned.

"I-I need some time to think," he stammered.

Vanessa was seething, "Who are you?" she hissed at Adam.

Adam stood and faced the woman, "Who are you!"

"I'm Barry's fated lover! Or... I was," Vanessa's voice trailed off.

Adam didn't think he could trust Barry anymore. He wanted to fight...but he couldn't. Adam stood there with his fists clenched, glaring at Barry as he tried to convince Vanessa to stay.

"Barry, don't you remember when I stung someone for you? You...you were there for me. I-I thought you cared. At least, the Barry I knew cared."

Barry was split between the two...he wanted them both. He was so deep in thought he didn't notice Adam leave. Vanessa waited for an explanation.

"Listen Vanessa, I-I don't want to give anyone up. I...I love both of you."

He looked around, about to say something to Adam, realizing he was gone. Vanessa looked disgusted.

"You can't be in love with two people, make up your mind," she growled before walking away.

As she walked away, she began to cry when nobody could see her. Barry was the only good she had after Ken. She had nobody. Barry showed her how to love again. She sat on a bench and heaved out a breath as the fight left her. Was she too cold to Barry? To his partner?

"Vanessa..."

Barry felt stuck. He could no longer live his double life in peace. He flew back to the hive. Barry found Adam floating in Barry's pool of honey. He leaned in the doorway and watched. The sight of Adam shirtless made Barry shudder.

As he watched Adam dive below the surface, his thoughts of Vanessa began to fade away. Was she worth it? He never felt this way with her. Adam's stinger surfaced and Barry sucked in a breath. His hand tightened on his arm. The sweet scent on honey blinded him from all his problems as he concentrated on Adam, and Adam only. It was intoxicating, the shape of his thorax pushed his last thought of Vanessa away. Adam's scent began to mix with the honey and made a desirable aroma.

Adam saw him and both of their faces turned red.

"Barry..." Adam said contentedly.

"Adam!" Barry jerked out of thought.

They stared intently at each other as they attempted to gather their thoughts. Adam gingerly lifted himself out of the honey.

"You have five minuted to explain yourself," Adam said coldly.

Barry was stunned by Adam's tone. "Um, well..." He stopped... "Ah, I-I want both of you...In a world where that seems like taboo, it's really hard on me."

Adam had no more sympathy for Barry. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"I want you to say, well, do you even still care?" Barry said.

Adam's voice softened, "Of course I do...Wait a second! Don't put this on me! I know you still love the human, Barry."

"I can't help myself Adam... My heart wants what it wants."

"This is why I'm mad! Pick one of us, you can't play both sides forever," Adam's wings twitched with anger.

"I... I choose you," Barry's voice rang out through the room.

"Barry... Are you sure?"

Barry wasn't sure if he was lying or not anymore, "Of course, it's always been you Adam Flayman."

Adam's face lit up, "Barry... are you for real?"

Barry looked at Adam as he walked closer. He dipped his foot into the honey, then proceeded with the rest of his body. He arrived to Adam's spot. Their thoughts faded away and they submerged themselves together in the honey.

-End of Chapter One-