Crushing on You

“I’ll give you chocolate.”

“No, Sirius. This is stupid. Just do your own homework.”

Sirius sighed and lifted his head up from against Remus’s chair. He squinted at his homework like he was trying to decipher a foreign language. “But I don’t understand any of it!” he gestured passionately towards the piece of parchment. There was only a small paragraph written on it.

Remus glanced at the parchment and smirked. “You’ve made it that far.”

Sirius gave Remus a pleading look. “That’s all I know, Moony!”

Remus rolled his eyes and dog-eared his book, setting it down beside him. He slid out of his chair and knelt next to Sirius, pointing at two potions in the textbook laying out it front of them. “Polyjuice and the Shrinking Potion go together. They make the growth potion because the transformative quality in the Polyjuice mixes with the size factor in the Shrinking Potion.”

“Thank you,” Sirius said dramatically, jotting down the information. Remus gave him a smile that was a little more than friendly, and Sirius felt his heart skip a beat.

Peter, Remus, James and Sirius all remained in the common room long after everyone else, Remus helping Sirius with his History of Magic homework, and James competing against Peter in Wizard’s chess. Soon, though, James and Peter rose out of their chairs, yawning. James stretched and said, “Me and Pete are off to bed. Coming?”

“No,” Sirius said at the same moment Remus said, “Yes.”

Sirius gave him a look. “No, you’re staying here and helping me with my homework.” Yes, he needed help, but that was only part of the reason Sirius wanted Remus to stay. He wanted his company.

“I’m tired, Sirius.”

Sirius put on his best disappointed face and looked at Remus mournfully. Remus sighed. “Fine. But only for a little while.”

James and Peter disappeared up the staircase. Remus and Sirius worked in silence, with the occasional correcting comment from Remus.

“No, the Great Goblin War occurred in thirteen eighty-five, not thirteen ninety-five.” Remus said, leaning over to point out where the mistake was.

“Oh, yeah,” Sirius answered, turning to look at Remus and inhaling quickly. The two were almost nose-to-nose, and Sirius found himself entranced by Remus’s big, tawny irises. “It was… no problem….” Remus muttered quietly, eyes glued to Sirius’s lips. They leaned in closer until their lips finally met, and they shared a kiss.

Sirius broke off in the middle of the kiss, an expression of utter horror on his face. “Oh my God,” he whispered. Remus was speechless. Sirius leapt to his feet and raced up the stairs to the boys’ dormitory, the door slamming behind him. Remus finally found his voice and called out, “Sirius, wait!”

But, he was left alone in the common room anyway. Remus buried his face in his hands and refused to cry, swallowing back a lump of tears. That hadn’t gone as well as he might’ve hoped.

Meanwhile, Sirius lay flat on his back on his four-poster, staring at the ceiling with his curtains drawn. He wasn’t gay. He can’t be gay. He was completely, one hundred percent straight. He was strictly into the ladies. But why had he enjoyed the kiss with Remus?

‘This can’t be happening,’ he thought, turning over and stuffing his face into his pillow, groaning softly. ‘I can’t seriously have a crush on Remus Lupin.’

Breakfast was one of the most awkward things Sirius had ever experienced. He refused to look Remus in the eye, and no one was talking. James was glancing between Remus and Sirius, obviously trying to decipher what was going on between them. The air seemed to be thick with tension, enough so that you could cut it with a knife.