Gone For Good

Chapter 1

There are only 2 things that a guy you have fallen in love with can do. He can either make your life amazing or he can eternally kill you. When a guy you love does not feel the same way about you, you feel like someone has broken your body, stabbed you, and then healed you only to do it again. If a guy you loved, loves you in the same way he will make your whole world round. In fact, you will feel like you are living a totally new life. Unfortunately, for me, I have only been killed and healed so much that I'm surprised I'm still alive. I have never even had a positive gleam of what life would be like if a guy I loved, loved me too. That's why, when you are probably reading this, I may not even be alive. I've been through a lot ever since I was 12, that now I'm happy I'm gone forever from this cruel society, this painful earth, and most importantly away from all the boys with their charming face, gleaming eyes, and their "fake"amazing personality.

If you're a typical Indian girl, you are probably thinking that I'm stupid as pardon my language, fuck. But, as I was a proud Indian American, and no, I was not fucked up, I was a normal teenage girl. The main problem was that opinions mattered to me and that I always doubted myself. I never thought I was good enough. I thought I was fat, dumb, and unappealing. I always knew in my heart that I would never get a guy to like me. But, I still kept hope. Whoever is reading this should know, that hoping will destroy you. It ruins your life so much that you want to die. Just like me. I kept hope that maybe some guy will accept me for who I am. That didn't work. The hope inside me drowned amongst the sorrows and tears I had shed.

You must be wondering what major thing occurred that destroyed me. Well, it was supposed to be a secret, but I am dead. So, it wont matter. You can tell whoever you want, put it in the newspaper, broadcast it. If I was there, I would have prohibited it, and if u did, I would have said, "I'm sorry, but you really hurt my feelings." But, I don't have feelings anymore. Neither do I have a choice. You can do whatever you want with my secrets. You won't care, and I cant stop you. But, let me tell you 1 thing, It won't affect me. I'm dead after all.