Saviors

Her

Why am I even here? No one cares. No one would notice if I'm gone. I am one of those people that are just on this Earth for no reason. People always say "You're gonna change the world someday" but that's not what I believe.

My friends don't notice if I'm there. They don't care anymore. They probably won't notice if I'm not alive. Would they?

Probably not.

I woke up this morning with my wrists sore. I barely remember what happened. Oh right. I slit my wrists about... I don't even remember how many times. I get out of bed, and I look around at what used to be a safe, and happy place. My bay window. Now, the flowers outside are dead. The window is locked. The curtains are shut. She hasn't climbed into our happy place in about 2 years. Or at least that's what I thought. It actually has only been 2 months, but without her, my life is dark. My (ex) best friend, Maya, practically stole my boyfriend. They practically ran away with each other. Right in front of my eyes.

FLASHBACK
"What the hell Lucas???" I scream as I see him literally sucking on my (ex) best friend's face. The split away from each other.

"Riley it's not what it looks like.." He says quietly, trying to calm me down.

"THEN WHAT IS THIS???? MAYA. TELL ME. NOW. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH MY BOYFRIEND."

"Honey let us explain. It was an accident an-"

"Accident? You accidentally were sucking on my boyfriends face? What the hell guys? Actually, never speak to me again. Goodbye."

I ran back to my house and locked my door. I ran to my bay window, and without hesitation shut it and locked it. Oh look! In the bathroom, there were my razors! I haven't used these for at least 4 days. I grab them and roll up my sleeve. Shutting my eyes, I slashed my arms about 12 times. All my pain seemed to disappear. I washed the blood from the sink, and wrapped my arms. Walking back to my bed, I hear a tap at the window. Thinking it was Maya, I ignored it. *tap tap* There it is again!! I rush over, and see Farkle. We've made eye contact, so I can't just pretend he isn't there. As I unlock the window, he climbs through.

"I heard about what happened." He said gingerly.

"Yeah. It's fine though." I stare at my arms.

"Riley, why are you starring at your arms? Oh god no."

He rolls up my sleeve and unwraps the bandage.

"Shit." He whispers

"I'm sorry Farkle. It hurt too much to see Lucas with her."

"So that gives you the right to self-harm??" I stare into his eyes, which are starting to fill with tears.

"Why would you do this Riles? Why?"

"Because it feels good Farkle. My pain goes away. I forget it almost immediately. I'm sorry. I promised I would stop. I was doing ok, but Lucas and Maya pushed me over the edge."

I couldn't finish my sentence little rant before I feel him wrap his arms around me and pull me closer.

"Farkle, don't let me go. Ever."

"I don't plan on it."

FLASHBACK OVER

That brings us back to where I am now. Standing in the subway station, I slowly approach the rails.  I'm standing on the edge of the ledge as I hear the train approaching. I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna die. I'm not going to be alive anymore finally. It's all going to end. Finally. Here comes the train. Goodbye world. Goodbye mom. Goodbye dad. Bye Auggie. Bye Farkle. I'll see you eventually. I feel a hand wrap around my arm and pull me away. GODDAMMIT. WHY CAN'T LIFE JUST LET ME DIE. I DON'T WANT TO LIVE. I turn around and see a very familiar face.

Farkle Minkus.