Breathe

Chapter One

Book cover made by Fucking_Trevor

      No, she couldn't tell me that this was happening. So your just going take my father away and expect me to be okay. "Oh baby it was gonna be alright he was gonna come home." , the same words I always got. He wasn't a good man but he didn't deserve this. I didn't deserve this. My mama didn't deserved this. My brother and sister certainly did not
Deserve this. So why now? Why did the pain have to come all at once for today. I thought this as I laid upon my mothers dead body. Yes , I know you would expect me to cry. I didn't instead of the cold tears falling my heart was stone cold. It all went to mind. Heartaches forming it was all coming back.
         My eyes opened to the heat of the room and light of the brightness of the sun. "Tritnney
Are you there?" Says the guy who I fell in love with since the 8th grade who happens to be my boyfriend. I start to wipe the crust off my eyes and say , " What do you think. " I give my body the strength to get off the bed. Keep breathing.
I looked out the window of an actual view of the big busy Manhattan.
         I grab a towel and hop in the shower. Turning my phone on to Pandora and putting on "Gased up". Cleaning my curls and letting it out wild & free. I come out and wrap my towel around. I wrap the other small fluffy towel around my head. "Hurry up you know you ain't wanna be late for school!" Davonte yells across the house. Yes I do have an apartment in Manhattan  and no he does not live with me. I ignore him.  I mean give me a break it's my last year of high school! I apply my lip balm and some makeup not too much. Ain't wanna be looking like no clown. I get out the bathroom and he stares me down. "Get out I need to change." He gives me a smirk and walked out. I change into a pastel pink sweatshirt that is a crop top. Then into cropped jeans and converses. I grab my purse and head out the door. "Becky!!!" I yell as I scram to find her sliver bmw. She opens the car door for me and I slid in.
We got at the school. Eh our school was okay. It was big for a high-school but small for a college. Becky looks at my arm , "Tritnney what the hell is on your arm?!" I take a look. The cuts I got. I remember...... father used to hurt me a lot and the most. The White cops found every way to prove him guilty. I tried everything to not be my father or dare even look like him. I had no choice. I had my Momma's face to think of her death. I had my fa- . "Hello! " Becky snaps getting me out of thoughts. Oh shit I'm gonna be late. I ran past Becky into the school building. Passing by the same punks , scrubs , loners oh i don't know!
I get into my seat of English hall just before the bell rings. I pack up my things and get of class
Corner of my eye I see Blake. My old crush. Is it weird that I still think about him. I mean i can't help it. With his curly black hair , Ombre hair dye on the top , the clothes he wears , his voice. Ugh snap out of it! I look away to see the blond Ghetto barbies. Mandy glares at me. She was the leader. Light brown , blond hair and too much makeup. Then There was Mickey. The playful one. All her clothes colorful she was just mean when Mandy was Around. Lastly Lace.. my old best friend but I stop caring since freshman year. She can go to hell.
I flip my hair over my head as I try to stay awake in miss velvets class. "Alright you guys are gonna get some partners to do the project. I don't know about you two going home but all I know is that this is 75 percent of your grade. Your partners are... Trittney and Becky, Julius and Makayla , blah blah blah and blah." I wanted to yell. I wanted to dig a hole all the way to the bottom of the earth and lay there. Was this ever gonna end?
           I continue to play with and my hair. "Hey nerd." Lucas says in his usual sarcastic voice. "Hey Mars." I reply back. Lucas stares at me, Making my heart tinkle. He quickly looks at his phone. "So um that project is gonna be a totally bummer." He starts to speak head down staring at Lacey's latest face book feed. You see there's only one problem and I'll you'll let find out. "So uh you know what this project is about?" Lucas says blindfolded. "It's a project where you get a subject talk about it and present it basically." I roll my eyes to see Lacey coming over. She kisses him on the cheek. Her existence makes my blood boil. Lacey flips her crusty hair and sits on Lucas's lap. Miss velvet gives them a look and writes something down , "Lucas your with Trittney now Lacey and Becky. Lacey groans and walks back down to her chair winking to every boy in the class. "Looks like your stuck with me mars!" I smile. He looks away.
5th period lunch the happiest period of my whole school year. You can go outside and eat. You'll be free for 45 minutes. I grabbed my school bag and waited for Becky at the lunch table. "How's your lover boy Devontae?" , she says in that long tone. I think about that for a second and ignore her question. "I'm just fine thank you." I don't why I got so ticked off but nothing feels right with Devontae he is always disappearing. She rolls her eyes.