Crack Classic Rock Oneshots

Jimmy Page x Jack Daniels

"Nope. Nobody wants me."

"Okay. I'll take u to my Glorious Band and spare your life by that."

"Great,"  Bonzo smiled, bc he was a simple man.

Meanwhile the stranger from the street put Jack Daniels back on the floor and tried to back of from these idiots, but unfortunately Jimmy noticed him. "Hey, you!"

"...what."

"Are ye playing on something?"

"No."

"Alright. You'll sing. Your name?"

"B-but," he tried to protest.

"Name."

"Robert Plant."

"Welcome to the band!"

Guys were really happy, rainbow n all (ok rainbow later). Maybe except the Robert, but as we saw, his opinion doesn't count.

"Now we need some bassist!" Page screamed and ran into the street, looking around.

"Hey, you!" he shouted to the totally random blond guy. "D'ya play a bass?"

"Um, yeah?"

"Fuckin great, welcome to the band!" said Jimmy and dragged him to the garage. That guy, John Paul Jones, was really confused, but screw it.

"This is not gonna work," said Robert, being a born optimist. "We'll go down like a lead Zeppelin and..."

"OmyJackDanielsbrilliant!"  Excitement sparkled in the black mage's eyes. He took a paper and a pen from air and scribbled it down. "Led Zeppelin."

"What."

"Our band's name."

"But you know it's spelled diff-"

"Great!"

"But I-"

Nobody is listening to you, Plantie.

That's how the Led Zeppelin was born.

* * *

The guys were getting ready for their first concert. It was really fun.

"What is Satan doing here?" Plant asked with a distate.

"Tuning my guitar, why are you asking?"

Robert slowly withdrawed.

"I've lost my drumsticks," Bonzo complained. 

"Play with your hands then."

"K."

That guy who played the bass was sitting in a corner and wondering, what the hell is going on here. Nobody knew tbh.

Anyway, the concert was brilliant and has risen them to the top, to every newspaper, they were on mouths of everyone. Led Zeppelin was everywhere. People went crazy about them.

A few months passed. The musiciant started to really like each other... hahahah no. XDDDD But the black mage Jimmy Page loved that style of life. He had his guitar, he had drugs, he had his endless Jack Daniels... what else a man would want? Oh, yeah, Robert Plant.

And that Plant fellow... he discovered he has a crush on Page. Like really. Singer was head over heels in love and jealous as hell about the relationship between Jimmy and an alcohol bottle. Complicated love triangle, indeed.

But one day everything changed.

After a tiring concert, when they said goodbye to the Satan, Robert was so exhausted that he took the first decent bottle and drank it. 

Of course it has to be the priceless bottle of Page's Jack Daniels.

Robert, ur gonna die. :)

When the vocalist realized what he has done, he begged his friend for help and his good bandmates ran away and left him alone nicely.

Great.

"PLANT WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE." The sky was shaking from the furious Jimmy Page's voice. 

"Shit."

"MY JACK DANIELS! MY LOVE!" 

"Umm... sorry."

"WHAT AM I GONNA DO?" Page was crying the tears of pure sadness for a while and then decided that screw it all. 

"You drank my girlfriend, so you'll be my new one."

"What the f- okay," Robert agreed, very pleased to be his girlfriend. Finally, his crush has noticed him!

And then the immortal couple, Jimmy Page and Robert Plant abbandoned their mates and went to make Jimbert. 

Everyon lived happy after after.

THE END ☆☆