Seeing Clearly

Chapter Two

“She blames herself Tina” Lily blurted out, her eyes once again on her niece. Tina raised her eyebrows in confusion.

Lily continued. “She said she was ‘sorry about everything’. It’s like she believes that she’s actually had control over these past few months.”

“That’s common,” Tina said shrugging. “Even more so with adolescents.”

Lily turned her eyes back to Tina and gave her a knowing look. “Adolescents? Okay, this conversation is officially over. Tina’s totally gone into work mode.”

Tina laughed and drained her glass before standing up and grabbing the bottle off the counter. Lily walked into the kitchen and opened the oven. She grabbed a set of tongs, flipped the chicken burgers, closed the oven, and turned around to face Tina who was fitting the cork back onto the mouth of a bottle of Alice White. Have a glass with Alice, the bottle said. Well, if you insist, thought Lily.

Tina handed Lily her newly filled glass and walked back to the table, watching her daughter and her newfound friend. Danielle moved her hands around wildly as she spoke; Alaya was listening intently, a small smile on her lips. Tina held the cup to her mouth, pausing halfway. Something about Alaya’s body language caught her eye. Alaya’s left lay lazily over her stomach, but Tina could see that her muscles were tense- a very defensive motion. Her hand curled protectively over her right side. Alaya had a tight grip on her lemonade.  She held her back straight and her shoulders stiff. Everything about her body language screamed stay away. It was hard to believe, from her demeanor, that the girl was laughing alongside Danielle.

"Lil, when does Alaya have her checkup?"

Tina met her friends gaze and smiled while waiting for an answer.  "Tuesday, three days from now. She’s scheduled for an eye and brain scan, then for a physical."

"Tell the doctor to check her right side, she's hurting."

Lily rolled her eyes. “Crazy shrink never takes a day off”, she muttered quietly under her breath. "You just met her and you're doing a better job than me!" Lily complained.

Tina had to stifle back a chuckle. "I'm just letting my job take over, as usual. Don't pay me any mind." Tina glanced out the window again, her eyes resting on the girls. It was a while before she spoke again.

"She's broken Lil. Most adults have a hard time making it through what she has."

Lily sat down with a resigned sigh. “I hope she’ll open up. I mean I know what the police told me, but I want to hear her story.”

Tina joined her friend on the banquette and put her hand over Lily’s. “She will darling’. You just have to give her time to pick up her missing pieces first.”

                                                                       

Lily and Alaya had just left Danielle’s house and Alaya was feeling surprisingly happy. Danielle had kept her laughing all evening, and Tina was very much like her daughter:  great sense of humour, definite attitude and a non-stop talker. Alaya knew that both she and her aunt had enjoyed the visit- they had both needed it.

Lily sighed contentedly, stretching out her arms as they entered the house. “So, what did you think of Danielle?”

Alaya slowly moved in the direction of the staircase. Five steps, four, three, two… Her hands landed on the sturdy railing then, as expected. Alaya lifted her right foot onto the first step carefully.

“She’s a talker.”

Lily laughed from behind Alaya and once again cupped her hands around Alaya’s shoulders, steering her up the stairs. “She is quite something. I was hoping you two would get along. Now you’ll know someone when September rolls around. You won’t be relying on a complete stranger to show you around.”

“That’s true,” Alaya said. She had spoken more in these past three hours than she had in the past eight months. It felt strange, but nice in a way- like coming back to her old self.

Lily was babbling on- something about a new year and new opportunities- but Alaya wasn’t listening. The guilt had begun to take over. How could she be smiling right now? Who was she to be happy? Alaya shuddered, as the all too familiar voices returned. You don’t deserve this.

Lily, suddenly sensing Alaya’s change in mood, stopped her sentence short. “Okay so, I guess we’ll talk about school another time. Your pj’s are on your bed. Just throw your clothes on the ground and I’ll deal with them tomorrow. If you need anything, anything at all, remember I’m here for you. ”

Alaya nodded mutely and gave Lily a small hug before walking to her bed. She felt around for her pyjama bottoms and threw them on but left her tank top on. She suddenly felt exhausted.

Alaya eventually managed to get comfortable, and with her arms tight around her waist, she found sleep. She wasn’t surprised when a nightmare invaded her peace. Not just any nightmare either, this was one she had grown used to seeing behind her eyelids.

*****

“Why hasn’t she woken up yet?”

“I’m sorry Miss…” “Lily.” “Miss Lily,” a deep voice said. “We’ve done all we can. Now all we can do is wait. All her vitals look good: normal heartbeat, standard pulse, and her flesh wounds will heal.”

“What about the... internal bleeding you told me about yesterday?”

“The blood pooled in the lining of her stomach and her lungs, but we sealed it,” the deep voice assured. “As I explained earlier, the burns on her stomach, thighs and chest will heal with minimal scarring. Fortunately, the fire didn’t penetrate the skin too deeply.”

Burns? Internal bleeding? These words made no sense to Alaya. Panic began to settle in. What happened? 

Alaya tried to open her eyes to ask these people what the hell they were talking about but found it to be struggle. Her head throbbed and her body ached.

“She was admitted four days ago showing symptoms of a mild concussion- there is no evidence of brain damage. She was hooked  up to an IV within minutes of her arrival, and we have been checking her regularly since. However, a coma is always a possibility in these kinds of cases.”

Coma! What?

“And she’s-“ Lily started. A loud gasp escaped her lips. “Alaya! You’re awake!”

Alaya swallowed guiltily. How had Aunt Lily known? Her eyes were still shut. Lily’s small sure hands stroked her arms and a deafening scream escaped from her core as pain racked her body.

“Alaya! I’m so sorry! Oh Alaya sweetie, there’s so much I have to- Wait. Doctor! What’s wrong with her eyes?” Lily demanded.

Eyes?

“Aunt Lily, how can you see my eyes?” Alaya asked timidly, not really wanting to hear the answer.

“What do you mean? …You’re looking at me Alaya.”

“No I’m not,” Alaya shrieked in horror, bringing her hands up to her face. She traced her lips, ran her finger up the bridge of her nose- everything seemed in order. Ignoring the agony this caused, Alaya felt for her eyes. Sure enough, her eyelids were open.

“Aunt Lily, I can’t see you!” Alaya cried out, hysterical now. “I can’t see! Aunt Lily, I can’t see!”