Why Be An Idiot When You Can Be Jill Ellis

Chapter 3: Fuck you Solo

I get back home from training with the team and I see so many Instagram handles about me, Jill!! Everyone is saying I'd do good off the team. But I don't know why because the only thing I do good is Carli!

Dear diary,
I can't believe that these fans are so delusional and disloyal!! Like, there just like Hope! I have to go. It's time to feed my peacocks. At this time my favorite ones come over and I named one of them Carli so I need to give them the first share of food.
Goodbye for now,

Jilly

I close my diary and walk outside to find my peacocks angry! I'm so mad!

"PLEASE FUCK OFF SOLO SHES MINE!!!!! SHES MINE HOE SOLO! SHES MINE!"

At this point all of my stupidest peacocks have shut up and are looking at me. I guess I had dropped the food while screaming at the sky/Hope and now all my smart peacocks are destroying the bag. I sigh. I think I'm going insane.

2 weeks later

Tonight I am going to a ESPN soccer grouping and dinner and all MLS, NWSL, USWNT, And USMNT Teams are going to be there. Guess what that means.

HOPE. HOPE SOLO. HOE SOLO IS GOING TO BE THERE.

She better stay away from my Carls. She lets me call her that now. Well she didn't say I could. But I can do whatever I want. Im Jill Ellis. So I meet up with the team at there hotel by my house and we take our private bus to the ESPN thingy. I don't give a fuck about what it's called I just care about Carli. (And my peacocks)