Puppy Love {Gavin Free} [COMPLETED]

Bad History

Even my doctor told me adoption was the best option. He understood my concerns, being adopted myself. But I knew if Gavin and I kept trying something good would come from it. I spent almost every night Gavin was gone sulking around, being upset, trying not to shoot my own head from the constant silence that plagued my house. 

I say plagued because silence has never been my friend, I always hated being alone. It always brought bad thoughts, and loneliness. I didn't handle being lonely well, and I had to get over it cause obviously Gavin wasn't always around. When he and I first broke up, Barbara or Mica were at my house constantly. There was never a moment someone wasn't with me, and now I have dogs but it's hard to get a dog to cuddle you, and you can't kiss a dog. I mean you can, but like, i dunno. It's just not MY preference to make out with a dog.

During the time Gavin was in England, I decided to find out about my medical health. I went through my adoption records, I talked to my parents, and even talked to the hospital I was born at. It took almost the entire time Gavin was gone. 

I had found out on my biological dads side, we had history of multiple cancers and addiction. On my moms side, it said her sister was infertile and their entire family had a history of heart problems. Wow, great. It'd be a miracle if I lived over 50. I don't know if I would ever reach out to them personally, but it was nice knowing their medical history and what I was expecting to get as I grew older. 

When I had gotten everything I wanted to know about my parents, Gavin was due home in 2 days. I was still sad he wasn't coming home sooner, because I'm clingy and am overly attached to my child of a boyfriend. It was incredible what he's done to me in the past 2 years I've known him. 

Geoff asked me to come in for work the day Gavin was supposed to come home, and I told Gavin to just take a cab home since I couldn't go get him. Geoff wouldn't let me leave the Achievement Hunter office, for some odd reason. I was glad I brought my laptop so I could work on some editing but it wasn't much. I only had a couple GTA's to edit. 

The boys filmed a couple minecraft videos, a GTA video and a trivial pursuit, which they asked me to join them in. I lost, miserably. We did a live stream of Golf with your friends and the fans seemed kind of upset Gavin wasn't there and I was, but I tried not to let it bother me. It just made me miss Gavin more. 

"Gabi, you alright?" Geoff asked me, after we were done filming. He had walked over to Gavin's desk, where I was sitting. I shrugged and looked up at my brother. "You sure?" He raised an eyebrow, he was not around much, growing up with me. He's 15ish years older than me, so he was always out of the house. He was around for holidays, but as soon as RT started, we barely saw him on holidays, since he moved to Texas. 

"No, I'm not but I don't want to talk about it here." I frowned, and looked back down at Gavin's desk, which was littered in trash. It made no sense, considering Gavin was such a clean person at home. 

"We're all family here." Jack spoke up from behind his monitor. Geoff nodded, agreeing. During this, I realized Gavin had a polaroid I had taken when we both still lived at Geoff's place, tucked away under his keyboard, causing me to smile widely. 

"I don't want you to think I'm pressuring you into talking, but I am your older brother, and I'll fight you if you don't tell me." Geoff chuckled, patting my shoulder. I sighed loudly, and nodded, looking up at him. 

"Recently, I went to my lady doctor to see if I were able to have a kid." I started, I watched Geoff's lips pull into a thin line. I frowned, knowing that I had never told him my plans of Gavin and I having kids. "And we did a test, and she told me I was infertile." I teared up, looking down at my lap. Silence fell across the office, again, something I dreaded. I knew they didn't know what to say. "I don't think I can ever have kids because of it. And if I do end up pregnant, it's a very small chance that kid will make it past 2nd semester. Or the baby could be born with disabilities. I did some research while Gavin was away on my biological family and found out addiction runs in the family, my great grandma on my dads side had breast cancer, my grandma had lung cancer, and his sister had a brain tumor that ended up killing her around the age of 16." I felt myself well up in tears again, I was choked up thinking about it. "On my mom's side, her sister was infertile, and ended up having a baby, but it was mentally handicapped, so she gave him up for it adoption. They also have a long history of heart disease. It skips a generation apparently, and my mom didn't get it. So if she didn't have any other kids, I'm bound to have it, or if I end up having a kid, they get it." I let a tear spill over my cheeks, quickly running a hand across my face. I sniffled and looked up and saw Geoff had sat himself down in Michael's chair. He looked tired, more than normal. 

"I-" Geoff looked up at me, after dragging his hands down his face and resting his chin in his hands to look at me. "I'm so fucking sorry, Gabi." He said, reaching one of his hands out and resting it on my knee. 

"I don't think I'll make it past 35." I choked on my own words. 

"Please, don't say that." Geoff sat up, giving me a stern look.

"You're going to be okay if you take care of yourself." Michael walked in, and resting a hand on my shoulder. "I swear that when Gavin finds out about this, he will never let you out of his sight and will do anything in his power to keep you healthy so he doesn't ever have to deal with you leaving him." He squeezed my shoulder and gave me a smile. I shrugged and looked up at my friend. 

"He's right. Gavin will NEVER leave you alone." Geoff chuckled, "One time Millie got pneumonia and I HAD to go to work, but Gavin insisted on staying home and helping her. She never left his sights." He smiled, more to himself. 

"But here's the thing, there's no getting better with the conditions I may inherit. Yeah, Cancer can be cured and shit but there's not definite cure to it because it always comes back in some way." I frowned, looking between my brother and Michael. I was being incredibly harsh on myself, I knew that doctors or scientists were working on cures for cancer but I think if I have so many cancerous cells in me, than what's the point of putting myself through chemo, and being in debt. I'd rather just shoot myself and end it all. Whoops. 

"Please, stop." I heard Miles voice, I turned around to look at him. "We lost Monty, we can't lose you too." His voice was defeated and hoarse. I don't know how much he heard, but hearing his voice crack, and him mentioning Monty, made me well up in tears again. I pushed Geoff and Michaels hands off me, and ran into Miles' arms. He wrapped them around me tightly. He buried his face into my shoulder and began crying. It broke my heart. 

Monty was our best friend, and I couldn't imagine how Miles felt, finding out that not only Monty is gone, but soon I'd be joining him, if I was unfortunate enough to inherit those awful genes. I was scared, I was absolutely terrified. 

There was an incredibly long, and sad silence that seemed to have fallen over the entire company as Miles cried into my shirt. I held him close, as he sobbed. I didn't know what was going on, I don't think I will ever. I'm not in his position. 

"I'm so sorry." I mumbled to him, as he sobbed, gasping for air.