A Single Droplet

Chapter Nine

We were unbuttoning each other’s jeans and before I knew it removing each other’s undergarments.  Harry was on top and I could feel him at my entrance. He bent down lips to my ear “This is going to be the best sex you’ve ever had”.

“I’m not quite sure about that.” I retorted playfully and then with one swift movement on his part I was crying out, I hadn’t expected it, but he was going hard and fast and my mind was clouding up in minutes. His stamina was impressive and I had managed to reach my high while he continued to pound into me before losing control and coming undone.

Harry rolled off me and lay next to me both of us still heavily breathing like we’d just run a marathon.

“So?” Harry managed to puff out in between breaths.

“Best.Sex.Ever.” I said between puffs turning to face him, and watch as he smiled an extremely adorable smile.

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Harry and I were both dressed and downstairs. I was sat on a tall wooden chair at his kitchen bench waiting while he made us both fried rice with prawns and onions. I had insisted on going home for dinner but Harry wouldn’t let me, he promised he was a great chef and it was a promise I was hoping he could keep, because damn was I hungry.

“It’s ready, prepare to be amazed.” I giggled while he sat the bowl down in front of me.

The food smelled and looked delicious. I gathered some up on a folk and put it in my mouth dreadfully slowly drawing out Harry’s anticipation. He was right; he really was a great cook.

“Compliments to the chef.” I said after swallowing down my bite. Harry seemed to perk up which I found adorable.

“Would you like to compliment his food or his devilishly good looks?”

“Hmm, just the food.” Harry made a playful pouting face sending me into laughter which only made him pout again, making me laugh even harder.

We had an amazing afternoon together and I couldn’t stop thinking about Harry the whole ride, until I heard the music.

I hadn’t driven this way on the way here, mostly because I was avoiding places with some memories I would rather not relive. The music playing was the type of loud you could feel vibrating through you, and the pounding was intensifying everything I was feeling.

I tend to try to forget about the past, there’s no use mulling over something that’s already happened but sometimes you can’t help it. When there was a person at some point in your life that meant something special to you, you can’t just forget them. That person was a part of your life, a part of who you are, and no matter how hard you attempt to suppress missing them you won’t be able to.

It’s a rotting feeling in your gut which you can’t escape. There will be people in your life you won’t expect to ever give you the opportunity to miss them, and when they do, it’s like being knocked over the head with a ton of lead. It’s funny how there’s those people that no matter what they did to you, what happened between you and them, or how much you know you should hate them, you can’t help but miss them.

Seeing her house across the street as a came to a park was weird. This house held so many memories to me, and now it was lit up like a Christmas tree, filled with people, and vibrating to the bass. Seeing her house sent me back to the dreadful memory I could never forget.

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“Please, Ryan!” I begged as the tears forced themselves out of my ducts.  I struggled to remove his weight off of me but it was useless. I could feel his hands on me, before the moment which he forced himself into me. I cried out in pain the tears more fierce now than before and that was when I heard the door slam shut. Ryan and I both turned to see a shocked Maisy standing, watching.

She was looking at me, and then looking at Ryan, she could see what was happening, she could see I was crying. I was sure she would hit him, tell him to fuck off and then leave with me while comforting me, which is why what she said shocked every bone in my body.

“What the FUCK RAVEN?!” I remember having no words, everything becoming so surreal, I was only really half there. I remember yelling and Ryan saying I came on to him, I had no words to defend myself; I never knew I’d have to. I remember Maisy telling me to leave, and I remember lying in my bed when I finally got home and not being able to sleep, laying eyes wide open all night long. I remember it like a nightmare, that I will never be able to stop reliving.

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I didn’t pay much attention in class last year but I do remember our hideously boring English teacher talking to us about a French term called l’appel du vide which means “The call of the void”. It’s the urge people get to jump when they’re at the top of a tall building, or to jump overboard on a ship. So whenever there is an option to do something you know is a bad idea, you’re brain always finds it strangely appealing as it’s the strongest choice you can make in the situation. This was exactly what I was feeling parked outside Maisy’s I knew it was a bad idea, I had no idea why I wanted to do it, but the urge was so strong I couldn’t force myself into any other way. I was going to crash this party.