P.S see you in heaven

I'll see you when I will...

Dear Annabeth,

My love and my moon. I know words cannot describe how much pain you are feeling. How much anger you must be feeling against me for leaving you so soon.

I'm sorry angel, I am unfortunately not the one who decides my own fate. If I did, I would give you a life filled with so much happiness and love,not tears and heartbreak.

I so very wish that I can have a longer life with you. I have prayed to the heavens above to fix me, to fix this inevitable disease inside of me, but I know one day it will take me to the heavens above. No prayer can fix this.

The doctors told me that heaven was such a beautiful place, but for me I know it won't be because I won't get to see you.

Your smile.

Your sea blue eyes.

Your beautiful body.

Our children.

Your dark tresses.

I could make a list that goes on for pages and pages but it still wouldn't present how much I will miss you.

I am having an absolute hard time writing this letter to you dear, but for you I would do anything. Even in my final times.

My love, I know you are shedding tears while reading this because I know that I am not there right now telling you how okay it'll be. So I'll tell you now,

It's okay.

I'm okay.

You're okay.

Everything will be okay.

Whether I'm there or not, it will be.

Also dear please don't forget to tell my little Rose that is growing inside of you how much I love her.

Tell her, when she asks about me, that even though daddy isn't there physically, I will always be there mentally. Spiritually.

Tell her I will be behind her every step of the way. From her first steps to first words. First kiss to first heartbreak. I will always be there.

Your heart is breaking but so is mine.

I
so wish I didn't have to go, but I have to.

Annabeth, dear please remember that I love you.

I always will, even when I'm not there.

I know it must be hard, but if need be, move on.

Move on from me. Start a new life, a second chance. Remember me but move on if need be. I can't keep you in chains when I'm gone. I have to let you start a new life. It's also about giving Rose a second chance. A second choice. Where she can feel the love of a father. I know that even though I will always be there, it'll be hard. Just please don't forget about me.

Your first love.

When I go, I will keep the memories.

Your silliness, your spitfire attitude, your gentle side.

I will remember the memories, of how you fell in a creek from getting scared of a frog. Or how you knocked me unconscious thinking I was an intruder.

I won't forget them. You don't either.

It is time for me to go. Don't forget are me. Also make sure to sing Rose the lullaby I told you about. Every night. Until she gets tired of course, but I hope she never does.

Keep me in your heart and memories.

I'll be watching over you always and forever.

Please do remember,

I love you my previous angel and delicate flower.

Love, John.

P.S I'll see you in heaven when the time is right.