committed*billdip oneshot*

committed

Prompt- Imagine person A tries to text person B "I'm coming for you" to creep them out, but it gets autocorrected to "I'm committed for you."

Human AU!
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For my dear friend, MysteriousDragongirl ,
Join the dark side. We have bold letters.
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He stared in obvious distress at his smartphone laying in front of him, practically pulling his hair out at the simple texts sent to him. His breath came in short puffs of air and, wow, was it getting hot in here? The texts didn't make sense at all. You should come to my house. Like, what if I said I had cookies?

What was that supposed to even mean?

Bill didn't mean to overreact. He really didn't! How would you react if the oblivious guy you've been flirting with for the past two months suddenly sends this? Cookies? Sure, he liked baked treats, they were great and all, but he wanted more than just cookies. But, more importantly, Dipper's house. This was a momentous occasion to tell their future children.

He decided he needed to calm down to be able to reply and slowly evened his breathing. Bill's racing heartbeat finally calmed down and he swallowed the lump in his throat. Now, how to reply....?

Saying yes outright would be a bit embarrassing. Plus, he didn't want to sound like an over-eager puppy(even though he practically already was one). He didn't want to say no either, because... Well, why would he? Subtlety would be the best choice of action, but Bill was never good with that, so he would have to go with the next best action; humor.

Yes, this he could do.

Bill gave a satisfied hum at his plan and action and nodded to himself, before unlocking his idle phone. He thought for a moment about what to type, before it came to his mind. The blonde grinned to himself and typed quickly.

He sent it and leant back in his chair, smug with his own text. Bill stretched and yawned, before slowly contorting himself out of his oh-so comfortable living room chair.

Bill made his way to the hallway closet for his black winter coat, before hearing a distinct ping coming from the living room. He grinned to himself and rushed over to his phone.

The blonde's grin slowly deteriorated slowly and morphed into a more confused expression. Bill, I think you're even gayer than expected.

Umm? How did he know? Shit, Bill said something, didn't he? He said something and now their entire friendship was ruined! Dipper was never going to talk to him ever again!

"My life is ruined foreverrrr!"

Bill dramatically flopped onto his couch and groaned in despair. He was going to die right here, on this soft stained couch. Ping. The sound of death.

It's kinda cute tho. I mean,'I'm committed for you'?

Bill glanced at his phone and his eyes widened, before he quickly scrolled up through their recent text messages.

Fuck.

How does I'm coming for you turn into I'm committed for you?

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A/n: I'm bad at endings sorry