Batman vs Deadpool

Deadpool vs batman, lets see how this turns out.
Enjoy!!

It was Wade Wilson and Bruce Wayne talking at the convention. "How nice of your ugly ass to come here Wade." Bruce says. "Shut up or I'll shove my skin down your throat you fat retired piece of shit" says Wade angrily. "Gentlemen, gentleman calm down, you met each other in high school didn't you get out all the jokes?" Askes the convention owner. "Nope" Bruce says. "I got heaps up my sleeve." "What else could you have up there, money or wrinkled skin?" Wade askes in suprise. "First of all" Bruce says. "Yes money something that you don't have and second of all, were the same age." "Noooooooooooooooo!" Wade cries. "We are!?" Bruce quickly jabs him in the jaw. "Owwwwwwww, what was that for?" Wade asks. "For being such a dickhead" Bruce says. "That does it!" Wade screams. He leaves the convention center and gets in a cab.

"Hello mr pool." Says the indian cab driver. "uhh hi" says deadpool, because he changed into his suit quickly. "So how did the decapitating go on your cousin?" Deadpool asks. "Very good he just spurted the blood before i stabbed him again... and again" the cab driver says. "Good, good!" Deadpool says. When they get there the cab driver says "so just a ten christmas high five?" "For you twenty!" Deadpool says. Clap clap! "Blind lady start packing my ammo bag im fighting someone on my naughty list!"

Deadpool hears a shot and goes inside. "Ahh shit blind lady" she is lying on the floor with a bullet in her head. At the funeral deadpool is crying. "She didn't even pack my ammo bag!!" Deadpool cries. There is a crash through the glass. "I am batman" batman says."Ahhhhh SHIT. Blind lady didn't pack my ammo bag, plus how did you know i was here?" Deadpool asks. "Dunno" batman says. "Just did."

The fight starts. Deadpool tries his sword but batman's armour protects himself. Then batman throws a bat-knife and it goes in Deadpool's foot. Deadpool trips over while batman punches him in the face. Deadpool spears batman while punching him repeatedly in the face. "Albert tell me deadpools weaknesses." Batman says quietly. "Okay" Albert says. "His one and only weakness is in his... balls." "Ummmmmm okay" batman says, weirded out. Batman gets his bat-sword and stabs him where the sun don't shine. "OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Deadpool says in a bloodcurdling scream. "What the shit!!" "Bye bye old buddy" batman says.
As deadpool says his last words batman goes to the batcave and packing his stuff. "BRUCE" Albert says "why are you packing your superhero gear?" "That shithead was right, im retired. "Well ok Bruce, okay" Albert says.

Count the words "shit"😁