Imagine.. Jared Leto Helping You Back To Sleep

The sunlight had just started to creep through your opaque blinds when you decide it's finally time to get up. The double bed you've slept in seems larger to you than usual due to Jared being back on tour. Even though you'd been together 7 months it was still no easier when he left: if anything it got worse and worse. Pulling on your blue hoodie, you walk downstairs and get a bowl of cereal. It was about 10AM and your phone was still upstairs and as you didn't need to do or be anywhere or anything today you decided to sit and watch the TV for the morning. 

You had recorded an episode of the IT Crowd the previous night as you'd fallen asleep early so you decided you'd watch that after checking the morning news.

A short, stout man sat and delivered the news on your TV as it neared to the next section of the news bulletin. 

"Actor and singer Jared Leto, 42, has been killed after being rushed to the hospital after an airplane crash."

Everything stopped.

Before you knew it: your cereal had dissipated over the floor that he had walked on, your arms had wrapped around the waist that his had only a few days ago however no tears ran down the cheeks he had wiped dry all the times before. You couldn't cry. You couldn't do anything. 

All of a sudden, a new sensation started to overcome your numbness: drowning. It felt like the tears that weren't evident on your outside were building up on your inside. Slowly, it worked it's way up from your stomach to your chest and to your throat to the point where you couldn't breathe. You lay on the floor choking whilst the TV became louder and louder repeating the same words over and over: 

"Jared Leto.. has been killed.." 

"Jared Leto.. has been killed.." 

"Jared Leto.. has been killed.." 

"Hey, hey, wake up.." You could hear something faintly in the background that grew louder and louder and less muffled. "It's OK, wake up.." Quickly, your eyes snapped open. You were unaware of your surroundings and anyone who occupied a space within them. You didn't realize you were screaming until you closed your mouth. You cornered yourself in the top right hand side of the bed, eyes wild and lost. Your eyes slowly adjusted to the dark and noticed something: a pair of striking blue eyes that were as wild as yours. 

"It was only a dream.." He whispered. 

You couldn't do anything but dissolve into tears. You pushed your knees up to your chest and clasped your arms around them. You felt Jared's arm push around your back and pull you closer to him on the bed before he enveloped you and you grabbed onto his shirt as hard as you could in fear that you'd loose him again. He took to rubbing your back as you struggled to catch your breath.

"It's OK.. It's OK.." He continued repeating.

"It felt so-" You were barely audible through your tears. "..real.." His eyes darkened. "The airplane.. The crash.." You couldn't speak anymore so Jared took your place in the silence. 

"But it wasn't, was it?" He continued to whisper which made you cry even harder as the reality that he really was here and hadn't been killed and left hit you. "Hey, hey it's OK.." 

"Please don't leave tomorrow" You say abruptly, causing Jared's muscles to tense. "I'd be nowhere-" You choke, "without you to protect me.." One thing he couldn't save you from was that he had to leave to go to Italy and you had to stay to go to university. He couldn't save you from the fact that in 7 hours he wouldn't be here to make sure you were OK.

"I have to," He chokes, his voice shaky. "But I'll be back before you know it, right?" You felt disbelief as whenever he went away it felt like a lifetime before he returned.

"I've always come back to you, haven't I? Do you want to know why?" Jared's voice had turned slightly more serious and he turned you around to look straight into him. You nodded.

"Because I'd have nowhere else to go." The 2am darkness seemed to be bring out the sincerity.

"I don't want to be anywhere else but here, OK? You have to believe me when I say that, right? You jump, I jump, remember?" These words resonated right through you as he pulled you in tighter. 

"I love you more than I've ever loved anyone or anything and I can promise you this: I'm not going anywhere." He spoke into your ear. 

"I love you" You managed to get out without your voice breaking. 

"Jared started to re-arrange the bed and moved your pillow back to it's original position although when he lay back down you stayed as you were with your hands on his shirt and your legs wrapped around his. 

"They say if you slow your breathing.." Even Jared starting laughing quietly at this reference which made him embarrassed. "Shall I try another one?" You lay with your body intertwined with his as he spoke in a quiet tone. 

"Let's go somewhere.." He started. 

Although exhaustion had started to replace your consciousness you replied, "Where to?" 

Jared's arm reached up and pointed out of the window that was to both of your right which was speckled with glittering openings in the sky. 

"To the stars.." 

_____________________________________________________________

The next day you woke up with your body aching and your throat dry. The similar feeling of a vast bed unsettled you as you clambered for your phone in worry. 

"Didn't want to wake you - you looked shattered. I've arrived safe and sound, as I promised. I guess we'll go to the stars when I get back. 6 days and counting.. Always. - J x