Savages

21: Good People

The blackhouse was haunted, Judit was sure of it. Creaks and groans and soft exhalations exuded from its silent corners. Lurking, breathing phantasms watching her intently. Why had she never noticed them when Sannah was here?

It was so much darker now she was on her own, so much draughtier. She couldn't bear it. She missed her sister physically, her absence gaping all around her. And it was so dark. The solar lanterns had never been strong, but now there was just one...Judit felt like she was underground, and a mine was about to collapse on her.

She shuddered. I have to get out of this house.

It was dark outside too, even though it didn't seem so late. There was a strip of royal blue sky that was yet to be enshrouded by darkness stretched over the sea, so she hunched her shoulders in her coat and headed towards the fleeing daytime.

As she walked, she automatically started going over that same old chain of thoughts it in her head again. She'd repeated it a million times, and it never progressed any further.

There's something inside me.

There can't be.

There is. You had sex, didn't you?

Yeah, but in summer. And I've been getting my period since then.

You're not any more.

No, but that's not how it works.

(Isn't it? Who knows? I can't even look it up. I'm so ignorant here.)

Judit's hand almost went for her screen, even though she knew there was nothing in her pocket. God, to be able to just search the web. Answer in seconds. Boom. But here, no. It's not like she could ask anyone.

Besides, you had your period. Then. When you had sex. You can't get pregnant when you have your period.

Can't I?

She was sure that was the case. Sure. She had looked that up online. Ages ago, granted, but facts don't change.

Back at Goldmay, they'd had these cringey sex education classes. Their middle-aged, dandruff-sprinkled religious education teacher had basically told them if they had sex, they would get pregnant and die. End of.

And the girl next to Judit had whispered that it was a lie. That it was actually really hard to get duffed (that's what she said, duffed, Judit remembered it distinctly. Such a childish way to put it. She didn't remember the girl's name though. Callie? Caley?).

Judit: shut up, you nyaff, no it isn't. People get duffed by accident all the time. (Okay, she said duffed too.)

Callie-Caley: Well my mum and dad are trying for a baby and she's got calendars and everything. Cos you can only get duffed at certain times. Cos of the egg.

Judit: that's just cos they're old though.

Caley-Callie: No, it isn't. You don't know. You can't get pregnant on your period, cos the egg's not there. It comes out in your blood.

Judit: ugh, that's gross. Stop saying egg. You're being gross. And you're wrong.

Callie-Caley: licit, kin. It's true. I bet you two digits.