Paperclip Man

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This is just a story that I made up to tell my boyfriend. Don't take it too seriously :]

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There once was a man who loved paperclips. He would use them all day and all night. Unfortunately, his enormous collection of paperclips managed to have been completely used up, so he decided to make a trip to Staples to buy more.

When he arrived, he searched around the store, but had no luck. So, he went to one of the cashiers and asked, "Where are the paperclips? I have searched the entire store and have been unable to find any."

The cashier then replied, "I'm sorry sir, but we do not have anymore paperclips. No one does. Some mystical force has seemed to deleted every single one of them from the world. I'm sorry. But, there is no need to worry, as we carry stap--"

"NO MORE PAPERCLIPS? NO MORE? THIS CAN'T BE TRUE! WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?!" Yelled the man.

"Sir please," Said the cashier. "Calm down. We have--"

"I MUST GO FIND SOME PAPERCLIPS!" The man then ran out of the store, leaving the cashier feeling puzzled.

"I will go on a journey." Said the man as he ran. "I need my paperclips." This journey only lasted a day.

The next day, the man returned to Staples to find the same cashier from the previous afternoon. "Oh, you're back." Said the cashier.

The man cried. "I was unable to find my precious paperclips..."

Facepalm.

"That's what I was trying to tell you." Said the cashier. "We carry staplers here. They're pretty much the same thing."

"...Stapler...? What's that..."

Facepalm.

The cashier sighed. "A stapler is something that is also used to hold papers together. The difference is that it actually punches the metal piece through the paper; thus making it more secure."

There was a silence between the two, as the man scratched his head in thought. "Okay." He said. "I will try one of these "staplers" as you call them."

The cashier showed the man a stapler, and he bought it. When he got home, he sat in a chair, reminiscing about his paperclips. "I'm sorry paperclips, for I have betrayed you. I still love you...Wherever you are." After much contemplation, he finally stood up and picked up his new stapler. He held it in his hand, looking at each and every part. "It's not as compact..." He thought. 

The man took out a stack of papers and placed it in the stapler. "Let's see how good it works." When he pressed down, however, nothing came out. "Hm?" The man removed the paper and opened the stapler so that it was no longer shaped like an angle. He then held it up in front of him at eye level, and..."Click."

The man had accidentally shot a staple into his eye. Screaming in pain, he fell to the floor as blood came out. "AGHHH!" At that moment, a hole in his wall began to form, and hundreds and hundreds of paperclips fell out. The swarmed around the man, and carried him to the hospital. It looked like a rainbow.

When he woke up, he was in a hospital bed. "What happened?" He asked. a doctor who was standing near him.

"You stapled your eye and were somehow carried here by what was said to be a swarm of magical paperclips. No one knows where they came from, seeing as they had been deleted by some kind of force...You got lucky." He closed his clipboard and walked out of the room.

At that moment, the magical paperclips appeared.

"Thank you paperclips! I knew that you weren't gone forever! I love you!" Said the man.

"We love you too!" Said the paperclips. They then swarmed around him once again, but this time, something extraordinary happened. For from that moment on, he would be known as...

Paperclip Man.

The End.

:]

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⏰ Dernière mise à jour : Feb 26, 2012 ⏰

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