Phat But Thick

Intro

I sat on the balcony ready to drop. I used the blade, I found in the guest bathroom to cut myself.

Cutting myself and drawing were the two things that kept me sane.

I had been sitting up here for a good five minutes re-evaluating my life. You might think I'm being nieve but what if you were getting pushed and tossed around like a worthless maid? What if your body was talked about, the way mines was?

I'm so tired of these rude ass kids. I'm so tired of being talked about and being the topic of conversation.

Whoever said words don't hurt is a damn liar. WORDS HURT. THEY HIT NERVES AND STRIKE CORDS.

Maybe it's for the best. I don't have to receive the bad end of the lashing, if I'm 6 feet underground.

I sat on the railing, dangling my feet. This was the most free I've ever felt.

"Don't do it Summer." I heard his voice.

"I'm tired of being picked on. It feels so good and free up here. Imagine if I jumped." I looked down at the ground.

I wasn't that far up but if I jumped, I would die. Which is what I'm aiming for. I used the blade to cut another streak in my arm. I looked the oozing blood with my clouded eyes.

"I don't want you to and I know you don't want to either. Summer just look at me."

I hesitated to look at him.

"There's hope. Don't jump. Just come up and we'll talk. Just me and you. Shawty don't  do this to yourself." He sounded like he was pleading.

"Don't be forced to talk to a monster like me." I shook my head as more tears fell.

"If you jump, are you gonna make yourself happy or them?" He asked.

"Me. You don't understand what's it's like to live in my world." I cried.

"You're beautiful. I just want you to realize that." He said softly and I was actually starting to believe him but I couldn't.

"Stooppppp." I shook my head profusely. "It's ok to think I'm ugly. I'm not what you're used to. I'm dark, I'm fat, I'm useless, I'm ugly."

I had my eyes closed and with every word, I was slipping. I let go of the railing.

SUMMER!

SUMMERELLA!

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Eh........ I tried

I tweaked it a little......... I can't believe I gotta fish up fifty chapters 😖