Deeper Than Love

Paris

I swear it's never a good feeling when someone's creeping in your room every night with the smell of alcohol and tobacco products on their breathe especially when your just a 16 year old girl in 11th grade with a whole life a head of you.  Hi I'm Paris, with a name like that you would think I have a perfect life you know mom and dad have a wonderful job, I live in a big house with fancy stuff..  The finer things cars, clothes, jewelry, money.  I should be living the life I'm beautiful with long hair every girls dream, but no unfortunately that's not me. I am beautiful with long curly puffy hair Im average built I stand about 4'11 short girl with a nice body and Hazel eyes but I don't have the finer things. My mother works over night at a nursing home as a cna and dad, ha he's living the happy life with his wife probably forgot I existed.  I'm just a project girl I guess you can say, but Im not even hood. I keep to myself having one best friend name Star. I love her more like a sister we tell each other everything, well at least most things.  Something's I'm to afraid to say.  I live with my mother and her drunk drug head boyfriend. My mother's so beautiful and she knows it.  She keeps he hair, nails, and toes did and the latest fashion while, me I'd be lucky if I even get a pair of shoes from the dollar store from my mom. Only time I get anything is for school, birthday and Christmas. She says she spend enough money on me with putting a roof over my head. Here it is my life.
Again it's never a good feeling when someone's creeping in your room every night with the smell of alcohol and tobacco products on their breathe. My step dad came in my room and I heard his belt unbuckle and zipper unzip.  He got into my bed and turned me over climbing on top of me. 
"Paaarriisss, " he said slurring his words.
"Please please don't do this please, I'm just a baby I'm not ready for this, I cried knowing my tears would only piss him off.
He snatched my clothes . "Shut up bitch take this dick.  Daddy's gonna take good care of you," He said.
I laid there crying while he forced his man hood inside of me pushing forcely in and out in and out in and out after 10 minutes he jumped up and shot his nasty sperm on my stomach.
"Go clean yo self up and go to bed, "He said before storming out my room.
I gathered myself and my things in went to the bathroom I turned the shower on and slid down into the tub my vagina hurt so bad and as the water hit it stung. I cried while the shower water ran down my head after about 15 minutes I pulled myself up and took a shower I scrubbed every inch of my body to be sure I got his toxic body fluids off of me.  I went into my room and called Star.  She answered on the first ring and we begin to chat.  I was still sad but I couldn't show it.
"Ooh Paris girl I got MyEsha to get Cash number for you," Said Star.
Cash was so fine he was 5'6 bright skin with green eyes and a fade. You could tell he worked out often cause he had a 6 pack with muscles  I ain't gone lie he was sexy. He was 20 and a boss nigga my dream guy, but of course he wasn't looking for a lil girl that was dusty all the time. He was use to them bad Bitches big booty ratchet hoes and that wasn't me. 
"I'm gone call him, Are you gone talk, "Star asked me.
I thought for a minute. "Sure Star, give him a call. "I replied.
The phone ranged four times and I was just about to give up and tell s
Star to hang up when a deep sexy voice spoke through the speakers..
"Who dis? " Cash said.
"Hey Cash, how are you? " I said nervously.
"I'm good but who dis ?" He asked again.
"Oh, I'm Paris I Ummm got your number from a mutual friend and just wanted to say hi. "
"Is that right?  You just called to say hi. "
"Yea, " I said.
He let out a cute small chuckle then ask how old I was.
"I'm 16."
"16, damn shawty you jail bate yo your parents know you on the phone this late you got school tomorrow. " he said.
I didn't know how to answer that I low-key thought he was upset so I was about to end the call.
"Im so sorry I was just," I said before he interrupted me in my sentence.  "You good MA,  but whats up what you called for again. "
"I don't know I just wanted to say hi." I said easing up a little.
"Alright, you said that. What's your name Lil one? "
"I'm Paris."
"OK Ms.Paris you obviously know I'm Cash."
I laughed at his smart remark.
"You sound cool how about I scoop you up after school it's Friday and you can come chill with me. I don't think I know you." Cash said.
I got excited, "OK cool I'll have my friend Star with me is that cool? " I said.
"Yea it's cool, I'll Holla at you later shawty. " just like that he ended the call.
When he was gone Star started squealing through the phone.
"Yasss Bihhhh, we gone be in there tomorrow. OMG what are you going to wear. " Star asked.
She was right what was I going to wear I had nothing nice in fact my school shoes were even run down. I didn't want my first time being noticed by Cash to be bad and the first impression to go wrong so I jumped up to look for something.
"Star this is bad I don't have anything nice to wear," I said while feeling the nervousness growing again. 
"Don't worry Paris I got you just relax, I'll be out front waiting on yu at school in the morning with a fit. "
Star always had my back in fact I was almost certain she cared more about me than my mother. I heard my step fathers foot steps sounding as if they were coming close to my door so I quickly said good night to my bestfriend and ended the call.