Original poems :)

Do you see me?

Do you see me?

And when I ask that think about it. Because NO. No I am not asking if you see my face and body standing before you... because honestly I'm not even sure if I claim them as my own anymore.

So I'll ask again
Do you see me?

Do you see the pain behind the smile?
Do you hear the sound of the people whom mock me and make me feel insecure, and of course make ME feel next to nothing?
Do you feel the silent tears that run down my cheeks as I cry myself to sleep on nights where it  feels like I can't take it anymore? 
Do you taste the guilt that overpowers my mouth after every crumb of food I swallow?

Do you see me?

Do you feel the strength it takes me to get up in the morning?  The constant fear of being judged and having to keep the face of someone who has it all together?

Do you see me?

Do you know what it feels like to be the strength and anchor for everyone else while you're still sinking?! Do you know what it feels like to have tons of friends and family that are here for you.. but you still feel completely alone? But then you remember, your friends aren't really your friends. Friends don't leave you sinking to the bottom of the never ending ocean.

Do you see me?
Of course not.

Because people only see what you want them to see and when you've been hiding the pain for as long as I... you get pretty damn good at it. But the thing about that is when you push everyone out of your life that matters and continue to try and hide, eventually the mask will fall and shatter and all that'll remain is a tear stained face and traces of mascara running down your cheeks all the way past that damaged smile.

And then that's when I will look up at you and ask.

Do you see me?

Now that the mask is gone and all that is left is the result from the past.
Do
You
See
Me
In
Pain
Yet?