I Am Me

~ One ~

Everyday, My alarm goes of at 5.45 am. I fumble around and hit snooze until 5.55am. Those precious Ten minutes allow me to mentally prepare myself for the potentially disastrous day ahead.  When my alarm goes off the second time, I kick the blankets off me, flick my lamp on, and roll onto the floor to begin my morning workout while I try to wake myself up. Sit-ups. then push ups, then planking. by this stage, Im usually awake enough to get up off the floor and do a set of squats. I do just enough to get my heart racing and my blood pumping. At this point I flick my bedroom light on, Jump over my bed to my window and open my curtains to let the light spill in.
The view from my window sucks. This morning I can see my step mums blue ford focus and the row of bamboo trees behind where my dads Audi would usually be parked. He leaves during my workout.

I head upstairs and get in the shower. Its Friday, which is shaving day. I don't have time to shave every day. so I make Friday my silky leg day. After my shower I run down the stairs with a towel wrapped around my head and around my body, I sprint into my room and close my bedroom door quickly. Its significantly colder downstairs as its a converted Garage so everything is concrete.

I sit in the edge of my bed and think about everything I have to achieve today. Exams are coming up so I am continuously trying to cram everything into my brain ready for the upcoming weeks of stress. I take a deep breath and begin to get dressed. I dress until Im wearing shorts and a bra. Im always paranoid i'm going to get makeup on my school uniform.

Doing my makeup is the best part of my day. I enjoy doing it. I hate wearing it but I love doing it. So I compromise with myself and wear it  because it enhances my features and its something small that makes me happy.  I blast myself with my hair dryer until my hair is almost dry, leaving it a bit wet means it will dry dead straight.
Now that the chances of spillage of makeup on my uniform are over I quickly dress and carry my school bag, wet towels and various other necessities upstairs with me.

I am greeted at the top of the stairs  by our five month old bison cross shitzu puppy named Bella. Her black and white body struggles to stay still as she jumps up at me, licking and chasing my feet as I walk to place my school stuff down on the couch. I pick her up and give her a big cuddle as she wriggles in my arms with excitement. My big baby.
The rest of the morning is a rush as I get ready and head out the door for school. Another hectic day. Just like any other.

School drags on. Lunch time sitting on the warm concrete in the sun with my friends being my highlight. we laugh at each other and make jokes. We make daisy chains and reminisce about what things used to be like. 

Friday evenings are always my favourite. I get to relax. ignore any homework looming and just chill out. My dad gets home from work around 4 and as usual the first thing he says to me is "Hey shorty, can you make me a cup of tea"
Its almost a given now. he is hardly ever without a cup of tea.
as dinner rolls around, Dad suggests we watch another star wars movie as I am slowly working my way though.
Episode V. Half way through I start fading and getting tired. Forcing my eyes open. I end up giving in and falling asleep. dad wakes me at almost 11pm.
"Its over Emily"
I rub my eyes realising I had fallen asleep and missed the end. "I think I fell asleep" I mumble as I stretch and drag my self off the couch.
"Goodnight" I tell dad and I give him a hug and make my way down the stairs to bed.
A sleep in tomorrow! Fuck yes. I cant wait.
I quickly fall asleep, warm and cosy.  ready for the good day ahead. 

"Emily.. Emily its me"
"Come in" I say thinking 'shit I must of really overslept if dads waking me up..' I roll over and glance at the clock. 7.30?! What the hell?
"Emily Ive got bad news" dad says. his voice serious and full of sadness.
"Yeah?" I mumble trying to open my eyes, but being still half asleep stopping me.
"Sues dad died last night... Sues just woken up Brooklyn to tell her and Ebony is here"
My heart misses a beat.
"Oh"
Grandads dead.
"Should I come upstairs?" I open my eyes to look at dad. He nods.
"I think it would be a good Idea."
Dad leaves. shutting my bedroom door behind me.
Grandads dead. He's been in my life since I was six years old. I wasn't that close with him. But now he's gone. resting in a better place. I take a deep breath and get out of bed and head up stairs to the family.