New Haven

two

I move from lying on my side to my back, but I hit the edge of the couch. My hand flies out, gripping the couch cushion to stabilize me back onto my side. Groaning, I stretch out my legs and back. My body still feels exhausted, but I know I have to get up to attend Darrel's burial today.

"There's donuts on the counter," Jase says as he passes me on the couch to the lounge chair. He has a blue plate in one hand and a coffee cup in the other. Jase sets the coffee mug, which is one of mine that I left behind here, which has a cute elephant printed on it. After setting down the cup, he picks up a chocolate sprinkled donut to take one bite out of it. Some of the chocolate gets mixed with some hairs on his mustache, which he licks away with a satisfying groaning sound. If there is one thing I know about Jase—it's his love for donuts. For Christmas one year I got him an array of donuts ranging from plain chocolate or vanilla to sprinkles then with the ones stuffed with stuff delicious goodness—Jase was in love.

My mouth starts to water. No way am I lying here another moment without a few donuts of my own because if I don't go now he will gladly eat them all. The coolness of the wood flooring gives a bite to the bottoms of my feet as I walk to the kitchen. There is already a plate beside the donut box. Lifting the top, I grab a chocolate cake donut—those are the bomb—and a vanilla sprinkle. I lick my thumb and pointer finger to get rid of the melted frosting as I go to grab a cup from the pantry so I can have some milk. When I begin pouring, Jase comes walking in. His eyes meet mine briefly before he puts his plate in the sink and running water over it.

After last night, I don't blame him for acting awkward towards me. Heck, I feel the same way when it comes to him. We fell back into our couple routine, and as much as I'd like to resume where we left off, I don't know if Jase does.

I take a sip of milk before walking back over to my plate. Jase is still at the sink. Instead of running the water, not his hands are bracing his body against the counter. Something is on his mind by the way his shoulders seem tense. "Thank you for staying last night," I mention, deciding it's best to end this dreadful silence. "It was comforting after being away for so long."

Jase turns to rest his side against the counter. He takes a step closer so the warmth of his body radiates off him to reach me. His hand reaches out to brush the bottoms of my strains on my back, fingertips peppering down my back before going back up to my hair. My eyes close, my body fighting the intimacy it wants to feel with Jase once more.

"Jase," I mumble, not sure how much longer I can take his idling touches. His fingers stop skating up and down my back. Instead, Jase flattens his palm against my side to pull me close to him.

He rests his forehead against the top of my head, inhaling my scent in the process. His fingers curl around my hip as he molds his body against my own. "God," he murmurs, kissing my temple. "I missed you so much."

Before I can say it back Jase leaves the room to sit back in the living room, putting distance between us again—leaving me with my donuts. It's apparent we're going to need to get back into the swing of dating because it's clear both of us still want the other. But how long that is going to take is uncertain.

***

My heels sink into the mud as I stand beside Jase. Pack members from both sides, some with their spouses who are human, surround the burial. Jeremy is by Duncan's side as he gives comforting words to remind us what an awesome man Darrel was, and that he will be avenged. Everyone from the North side said their peace if they wanted, then went the members from the South. Out of anyone why would it be Darrel? He was a funny man who only wanted what was best for our kind.