I'm Sorry

10- Updated

Quentin's POV

"Daddy don't go" my little girl cried while hugging my leg

"Yeah daddy we'll miss you don't go" her twin said hugging my other leg. My oldest son just sat down in the couch with tears streaming down his face. I turned to look at my wife or should I say ex wife. She looked down at the floor with a few tear marks on her cheeks while holding our two other kids.

"I'm sorry" I say dropping my bags and taking them off my legs to hug them. I went to sit next to my son and whispered in his ear "I never met to hurt you" after saying that I gave him a hug and ruffled his curly hair. I then went to my wife.

"I'm sorry" I said kissing the tear marks, then her cheeks, but she moved away. I then kissed and hug my 2 year and 1 year old sons. "Daddy loves you" I then grabbed my bags and left the house.

I just couldn't take it anymore. I had to leave. I really wanted that child, but after the miscarriage it made me realize something bigger, I never really was ready for any of my children. I know at this point up and leaving Ray to raise five kids all by herself seems asshole-ish, but its the right thing to do. I can't live this lie of wanting to be a father and loving husband. Especially knowing that those are just signs I just don't have.

Ray's POV

"Mommy are you ok?" Taylor asked. After Quentin closed the door the only sounds you could hear were the twins and Taylor sniffles. I cried myself to sleep for weeks before this actually day, and I was over Q.

How could a man say after 10+ years of being together that he doesn't want the kids we already have. I had no one to comfort me with my miscarry. He just blamed me and walked out. Like the coward he is.

"Mommy?" I looked down at my kids and nodded. A single tear left my eye. It wasn't a tear for him, but for my kids. I wanted to have a relationship like my parents. Married for years, kids, good job. The whole nine yards. But my kids can't have that now.

"I'm good, you guys go to sleep" they nodded and went to their rooms. I put Caden and Dustin to bed and went to my room. It smelt completely like him. I hated it.

I grabbed the laundry basket and the bed sheets. I wanted no trace of Quentin Evans in my home. He didn't want to be, neither did his smell.

A knock on the door stopped me from pulling the bed fitters off. A small head of curls walked into my bedroom, followed my two more heads.

Taylor, Kayla and Gabrielle walked inside to room. Their eyes landed on the bed and back at me. I could only imagine what kind of mad women I looked like. Red eyes, messy room, white fitted sheets halfway off.

"Mommy, are you ok?" Kayla asked walking deeper into the room. Gabrielle and Taylor stayed back. They were still trying to read the situation.

"Yeah Mommy's fine. I just wanted to change the sheets. It's almost the new year and I wanted to clean the house" I stated pushing my hair out of my face. My bare hand touched my face.

"How about this, you guys go to Grandma and grandpas and I'll call auntie Leila so she could help me. That way you get to play all your games without me annoying you? Yeah?" I knew my kids were smarter than this but they seemed to understand I needed my space and time to get myself together.

Quentin may not have the kids, but they were and still are the best thing I could've done. I gave them life, a home, clothes, and food, and in order for me to continue the roll of being their mom and unfortunately now their dad, I had to get my head in the game. I knew one person that could help...

"Hello"

"Leila, I need your help"

Word Count: 705