Abused by Mr J

08

===5 Years later===

I am still traumatised from Mr J and Harley's abuse but every day I crave them even more. Every night I would scream for them, I tried finding them for so long but it was useless. The police never seemed to find them, it was as though they had never existed.

"Sweetheart, are you ready to go?" I hear my mother call out. Since the kidnapping she had taken more time to be near me and spend time with me. Still every night I screamed for the mysterious pair who had changed my life forever. Quietly I follow and climb into the car. Alexis now 15 was still passionate about dancing, she had won many competitions and every time she thanked me. There were multiple times I tried to kill myself but Alexis my guardian angel always appeared to be two steps ahead. She cut my rope, she stole my pills, she broke the locks in the bathroom, she kept a close eye on all blades. She tried far too hard to keep me alive. Today was my first job interview, at a nightclub located in the south end of town. It was all I could find that had suitable hours for me. My mother didn't approve but I didn't care, I still didn't care about much.

"Sweetheart, you are lost in your thoughts again." My mother taps on the steering wheel. I know how to drive and I was all set to take myself but my mother insisted on taking me.

"My thoughts keep my company."

"Sweetheart!" She warns, she always thought I was trying to trigger myself but really I just had a new side to me. After a 10 minute drive filled with small talk and shrugs from me we reach the bar. Quickly I say goodbye and get out before she can try give me a pep talk or something. The doors are heavy but open easily enough.

"Hello, I'm Andrea. Im here for a job interview." I get the attention of someone at the bar. They smile and point me in the direction of a back room.

"Just go through there, the manager is waiting for you." Deciding it is best to be polite and knock I do so before entering the room. Inside I am greeted by a man, blond hair and black suit.

"Andrea, come take a seat." He motions towards a seat and I sit down.

"So this is your first job? It's not that hard don't worry. What you will do is dance with the other girls and serve drinks to customers." I nod, anxiety fills me about the dancing but I had years of classes, I'm sure I would be fine.

"You have had dance classes for the past 15 years which is more than most of our girls here. You seem perfect for the job." He says. The interview carries on for a while until it comes to the last lines.

"Usually I would say wait for our call but since you are the last interview and you seem the best option how would you like to start working tomorrow?" Gladly I nod and manage to choke out a yes.

"Perfect, wear either black or silver but we have clothes for dancing here. See you tomorrow." He says shuffling a pile of papers and standing to shake my hand. Smiling I shake his hand and head for the exit. To my surprise my mother was waiting for me."

"How did it go sweetheart?" She asks, her hands clasped together.

"I got the job." I sigh sitting next to her and putting on my seatbelt.

"Lovely!" She claps enthusiastically and starts to head back home. She still hasn't let me move out, she thinks I need more time and still need her support. I should be glad she cares now. My father had stopped the abuse but I would always remember how he treated me for so many years. It was best to just move on and put on a brave face, no one would believe me if I tried to report him.

"Sweetheart." My mind focused back in the moment, my mother said it was her new strategy to help me, I didn't see how it could work but I didn't argue.

"I was just thinking about the new job." I mumble fidgeting. She nods and leaves the conversation there. When we reach home I head straight for my room to take a nap, I still sleep a lot during the day. It became a habit I couldn't break since the kidnapping. I curl up on my bed like I use to and easily fall asleep.

<><><><>

Walking outside I could see a familiar face with blonde hair the tips blue and pink. My gaze traveled to a person next to her who at first glance I hadn't notice. His hair was a vibrant green and I knew who it was.

"Harley? Mr J!" I scream running towards them. They are so far away, why can't I get to them?

"Harley, J!" I call as I see them start to turn their backs.

"Harley please wait! Mr J I'm coming just wait!" I scream but no noise comes out. My vision becomes shaky and I can't see straight. My body shakes violently as I collapse to the ground. A bush that I didn't know was there swallows me and I find myself hidden under twigs and dirt. I am in a familiar gown, covered in maroon blood and leaves. I can't pull myself out, I am trapped by the branches keeping me captive.

"Harley, Mr J! I want to come back please!" I sob desperately. My surroundings change to a high roof top. A tub filled with water knives covering the bottom, a rope tied around my neck keeping me in the bath and bottles of pills in my hand. Desperately I swallow pill after pill and when they are all consumed the tub of water falls from the roof. My body hits the ground, soaking and covered in stab wounds. Death still didn't want me.

<><><><>

It had been the same dream for all these years, every time I went to sleep. Not a single detail changed. What was meant to be a 3pm nap had taken me through the night and into 5am. My first work shift would be starting in 12 hours. Desperately I untangle myself from the covers, I didn't want to sleep and go through that all again. I make my way outside to the garden still in yesterdays clothes my hair now in a messy bun. To calm myself down I practise my dance routine to Ride. It was already perfected and had been for a few years but it was like my anti depressant or anti anxiety. I didn't need pills when I had dance. Two years ago I had started taking pole dancing classes, no not to become a stripper but to become a stronger dancer. I knew how to hold my entire body weigh with one arm, I knew how to position myself carefully as to not hurt myself and complete complicated turns. Dance is my escape from reality and I am glad I have it. After an hour of constant dancing I collapse in a heap on the damp grass panting from the strenuous activity. I spend at least 10 minutes there catching my breath and relaxing. This had become my daily routine to keep myself grounded. When I finally decide to go back inside I can see it is 6:30am. Quickly I take a cold shower, I prefer them from hot ones. I love the cold feeling against my scalp as I scrub lime scented shampoo into my hair. I slip on sweat pants and an old cozy shirt that is starting to get too tight. No point dressing up until later. There just seemed to be something off about today.