how it could have been [brokeback mountain os]

End of July 2015

It was around noon when Ennis finally got up. Another average day in the boring life of the old man. After dressing himself in one of his used shirts, he made himself a cup of coffee, smoked a cigarette. Everything was normal, it seemed to be another meaningless day in his meaningless life. But suddenly he heard a noise outside.
Nobody ever visited Ennis here. Not Jenny. Not Alma Jr. They both didn't even send him a postcard. Ennis went to look anyways. Some part in him even hoped for Jack, which was, of course, incredibly stupid. The love of his life was dead.
Ennis opened the door. All he could see was a dog running away from his trailer. He shoke his head in frustration and wanted to get back inside his house as something caught his attention. On a pile of newspapers, unread letters and advertising brochures in front of his mailbox layed a new article. Ennis couldn't believe his eyes. A picture of two men kissing was on the front page on one of the later newspapers. He picked it up and had to sit down on the stairs because his legs were shaking. Gay marriage now legal in all states, said the headline. Ennis had to read it all over again. And when he finally realized the meaning of these words, a tear dropped on the paper.
"Jack!" His hands began to shiver. Memories were flashing through his head. It hurt so much that he tumbled back into his trailer, closed the door with his foot and fell on the floor.
Somehow he grapped Jack's old shirt he's kept inside his closet for years. He steeped his nose in the denim, trying to smell his friend.
But the smell was gone and so was Jack. Everything what was left seemed to leave in this second - in that second when Ennis knew that they could've had a damn good life together.
Jack always wanted that for them. To have a farm, anywhere lonely. Ennis was the one to say no. It was selfish. He wanted to protect his life, Jack's life, their life together. He thought he might get killed or punished if someone would discover their love.
Then Jack died and Ennis was lonely, so damn lonely that he wished he could've been killed because of being a homo.
"I love you, Jack fuckin' Twist" whispered Ennis in tears, knowing that his friend could never hear him say those words.

Ennis died three days later. He slept in with the hope to be cremated and scattered at Brokeback Mountain. He never was. But he eventually found his peace in eternity - with Jack.