JLo One Shots

A Girl Thing

[Leahnnifer/Jeleah]

Jennifer's POV

sigh.

Love proved elusive, once again. I've failed at love, multiple times. I failed at giving my babies a perfect life, a family that was whole. And I thought, after what was probably the darkest time of my life, I had found whom I hoped would be the one I'd grow old with.
I was wrong.

After my divorce, I found Casper. He made me feel safe, and loved. We were together for 3 years- but a few months back, things started to fade away. I felt him grow tired of me each day, and it still breaks me. He started distancing himself, texting me with all the same excuses saying he was sorry. He cheated on me- thrice. I should've took action the second time but I was so desperate and determined to have made it work between us that I pushed myself to believe his lies.
Its been almost 2 months since we've called it quits, and I still cry myself to sleep at certain nights. Feeling so guilty that maybe I'm just never enough. Or that I was too much. -Why is it so damn easy to just leave me? fuck around with my feelings like im some toy you could easily throw away?

If you didn't know me well enough, you'd think I'm this, controlling, boring and all about work type of chick. I'm really not. I party a lot, I do crazy things I don't regret, and I just live it up. Although at this point in my life, living felt so hard. My babies deserve better, I apologize to them often saying I try my hardest to give them a perfect life, but it isn't so easy.

God I sound so depressing.

-

'Jennifer, this really needs to stop.' Leah tells me.

Leah is one of those few people who stuck with me and stayed. We've been best friends for God knows how long.
We share everything, we stay connected and there for each other. Ha, we've even made out a couple times. Not like that though, we were drunk and out of our heads. It's one of those things we laugh about and never tell anyone.

She visited me today out of nowhere. I was sitting on the floor infront of my couch with a bottle of beer in my hands while 2 empty ones laid on the floor. I'm a mess. -and a handful. I hated doing this to myself especially since I'm a mother of two. But I had no other distraction for the sadness and disappointment that I felt in myself.

'Baby, I'm fine.' I try to say sternly.
'No you're not- jesus Jen get up.' She lifts my hand and supports my weight as I try to get up and walk up to my room.
'Don't make me carry you, idiot.' she teases.

It was a long process but I was finally in bed. I was aware that Max and Emme, my babies, were already asleep.
I tried to sit comfortably on my bed as Leah walks out to get water for me.
She was wearing shorts and a loose, white shirt that made her tan skin stand out. Her shorts fit her ass well which I found hot as fuck.  We both have huge asses and we used to use it as an advantage when we were younger. If I wasn't as straight as a hard metal ruler, I'd totally fuck her, I mean damn.
-woah this is probably the drink talking oh my god Jennifer Lynn you need to shut up.

'Here baby' she says, handing me my drink. 'Thank you.' I mouth as she sits beside me. I rest my head on her chest trying to show her I wanted her to stay the night. She knows when I feel like shit and does all in her power to make me feel better. God I love her so damn much.

I was a crying mess. My eyes were all puffy and I just really felt extra shitty today.
'shhh- baby its okay. I'm here, just let it out.' she says as I quietly whimper and stop myself from over-crying.
Every single day was so difficult. Going to work, trying to put on my bravest face towards my kids and everyone around me, and crying myself to sleep most of the time.
'Leah I feel so worthless.' I say to her.
She sits up in concern, 'Jennifer, listen to me. These men you've been with don't know what they had. You know what I see when I look at you?' she tells me as I face to look at her.
'What?' I say innocently.
'I see the most beautiful girl. Fragile, yet brave and feisty. And it breaks me seeing you down and doubt yourself so much like that. You deserve so much more than all the crap that you're getting. You're strong, I know that but I hate seeing you like this. Baby, if I could make this all go away I would.'

As those words left her mouth I found myself crying more while I stared at her eyes. I don't know what I did to deserve a person such as her in my life.
'Leah, you've been there like nobody else. You don't have to feel bad for me- I just want you to know that everything you do and everything you show me? I'm damn as hell thankful for. I'd be so much worse without you.' I say to her, trying my hardest to say it clearly as tears kept flowing down my face.
She hugs me tightly then stares at me.

'I'm sorry.' she whispers.
'There's nothing you should be apologizing about.' I say, making her smile widely.
It gets quiet for a while- then a question pops in my head.
'Leah?'
'hm?' she says softly.

'Why do you stay?'

'I stay for a million reasons. You don't have to question me for it dork.' She giggles 'Jen, I'm not like the those idiotic men who left you. I'm with you, even if the whole world turns its back on you I'll be right here. Always.'
'I am too. Thank you mamí.'
'I know, I'm just that great.' she says.
'don't flatter yourself now.' I say jokingly.

'oh so you want me to leave then?' she teases and almost stands up as if she's about to walk away, grinning to herself.
I grab her arm and pull her onto my bed. 'Nooo, baby stay here!' I beg her.
She laughs, 'You're hot when you plead.'
'weirdo.' I giggle.
She sits down beside me and we both smile at each other.

she leans in and kisses me softly.

Some people find it weird -when we kiss- but we don't. We've always thought of it as 'a girl thing' and did it a lot as if it were nothing.. which is exactly what it was- absolutely nothing.

Although this one felt so different than all the other times we've done it. The scene repeatedly played in my head as if I wanted more. The same scene and the same question kept wandering in my thoughts as I try to fall asleep with her beside me..

that kiss. why did it give me chills?

A/N:
whoOps thats it! I hope you all enjoyed that 🌚 dont forget to vote and tell me what you think. 💞
J xx