The Scottish Fetish

CHAPTER 16

Cameo by Matt Smith as the cab driver.
"I'll take care o' the bus later. Come along. As yer new manager, it's my duty to get ya home safely...by hirin a cab." she declared, pulling him along as she motioned to a taxi to stop. "Ruchill park. An' Step on it. I think he's about to hurl! " she ordered. "No...we need to stop off somewhere else first." the drunk rock star interrupted, choking back vomit. "Where? " a confused Ina asked.
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"You've gotta be kiddin me. Are ya tryin to get us killed? " she asked, staring out at the artificial snow-covered apartment building. "No, I'm not. I'm fightin for my love!" he proclaimed bravely, struggling to open the door. "No, yer not! Get o'er er, man! Move on! Yer gonna get beaten up by his goons! " she tried to talk some sense into him, yanking him by his leather sleeve, trying to pull him away from the door. "Let im go. You've gotta risk it for love, mate! " the spritely cab driver suddenly spoke up, egging him on, on overhearing their conversation. "Excuse me...But, no-one asked ya, kay?! " she reprimanded the nosy man. "Oi! Don't be mean to im. This young man's obviously been in love an' had his heart broken by a pretty lass too, eh? " he scolded her. The cab driver nodded in agreement. "Obviously how he ended up as a cab driver too! " she muttered. "Oi! A cab driver has feelings too, ya know? " the hurt cab driver cried out, overhearing her. "Stuck in a cab with two o' the most sensitive men on this planet." she grumbled, with a roll of her eyes. "D'you have a mint, by the way, lad? My breath smells fishy! " he asked. "Of course, I do, sir! By the way, it's an honour to meet ya, sir! " the excited driver replied, handing him a mint from his pocket. "Oi! " she yelled out, as the drunk (yet, surprisingly quick) rock star popped the mint into his mouth, gave her the slip and jumped outta the cab. "Good luck! " the cab driver called out after him! "This is all yer fault for eggin im on! Just for that, yer not gettin any fare! " she scolded him, before running after the stubborn rock star to stop him from doing anything stupid. "Bloody fare dodger! " the driver cussed under his breath. "Well, at least I met The Scottish Fetish! Wait until the boys at the pub hear about this! " he thanked his stars, before starting his cab and driving off into the night, continuing on his way to pick up passengers.