Damaged » h. styles au

Chapter 72 - Scarlett

“What’re you thinking?” he laughed lowly, kissing my neck. “You’re frowning so hard seems like you’re actually trying to decipher some impossible enigma or something.”

I snorted. “Not really, no. Or maybe, yes. I dunno. Wondering why you have cute soft curls and dimples and I don’t.”

He actually laughed out loud at that, sleepily, yet, but certainly loud. It was a Harry thing, I’ve learned. Being loud all the freaking time, no matter where, no matter with who. I kind of liked that a lot.

“Well, you have deep blue eyes and I don’t,” he reasoned then, as if the fact made up for the rest of his qualities.

“You have green ones. Still not fair.”

“You have boobs,” he shrugged, and I gasped.

For a second, I didn’t know if he’d just hit me or if the air had just left my lungs all at once, but it hurt, and I wanted to laugh, not being able to because I was flabbergasted. Not that I really minded cheeky slash naughty Harry, because it was so him, but for God’s sake he’d just woken up from a long nap and. God.

“Harry!” I scolded then, and he laughed once again, winking.

“What? It’s a perk. But anyway, you should complain to my mother. Should be illegal to make such a perfect human being, even though I don’t like the thought of having my mum in jail. Ask her for the secret ingredient or something.”

“You’re a twat,” I murmured under my breath, rolling my eyes at him with my hands still moving on his arms slowly. He didn’t seem to notice, and if he did, didn’t make a mention about it. “Can’t even compliment you that you get your ego so high. I’m gonna go back to insulting you all the time. You were more bearable.”

He shrugged again, scooting closer to me, digging his fingers deep on my waist and breathing in the scent of his own clothes on me – which I said I wouldn’t wear, but –, his knees bending awkwardly to fit his feet on the couch, but giving up once he realized there was no way he could do that without forcing us a bit closer to the edge of it.

“What time is it?” he whispered a second later, eyes closed again, voice back to the low and slow tone he usually used.

“I have no idea, really. Must be something around ten already,” I guessed, moving my hand to his curls this time, soothing them, slowly pulling it out to watch the strands uncurling on my fingers, then curling back once I let them go. I kept the movement constant, and Harry sort of purred at it, moving his head to get more. What a kitten. “Shall we go to bed?”

“Hm, no,” he whined. “Not yet. M’too comfortable to get up now.”

So I simply smiled, murmuring my agreement and closing my own eyes, feeling the warmth of his body against mine, completely isolating the embracing cold around the whole room. And in the silence again, my mind went back to everything he’d told me, how his eyes shone with passion and endearment, longing. Even though he was awake now, I ignored the fact, drifting off to my own theories, apparent new fears. At least for me.

Harry had a past as well. I’d overestimated him, I knew that, but it’s not like it was written all over his face that he still had traumas. And they were too deep for my liking, honestly. Because I was here with him at the moment, curled up on the couch, hearing him say over and over again he was able to wait whatever long for me to leave Tyler and be all his, but she was the one all over him. She was the one on his mind, she was the one inked on his body, probably in his soul as well. He obviously kept the memories of their past clear in his mind, and I was not sure I could compete with that.

I was just someone who was hurting him one time after the other, telling him I wouldn’t give up on my relationship for him, and yet giving him too much hope. I was the one fooling him around and he was going to get so, so sick of that. Soon.

I deserved that, though. Should’ve listened to my conscience from the very beginning, but didn’t, and there I was. In some sort of love with him, jealous of a dead girlfriend, but too attached to a duty to give myself to him completely. Meena had given herself to him. She was better than me. I would not replace her.

But still, that night, a while later, we went to his room; hand in hand, fingers twined, shoulders bumping, giggling like idiots, feet bare.

I had him for now. For now.

●•Author's Note•●

dedication goes to: @Kathy1Dsmile glad you like this, love! I can't tell if there's going to be a happy ending or not, you can see there're many controversies in the story. But. Well. Thanks! Becoming a writer is my dream.

note: I feel so sorry for Scarlett. She feels less than Meena. God, she doesn't understand, does she? But anyways. I hope you liked this one. So much still to happen. Ps.: For the people who read MTJA, just so you know, his friend's sister he used to babysit, that I mentioned in the short story, was Khaya. A few people thought the girl he babysitted was the one he was in love with. It was not.

next update: Tuesday (November 26th) 

900 votes for early update. Best comment gets a dedication :) Love you lots, really. - Dani xx