Dirty little secret

Chapter 1 - Introductions

Chapter 1

*Lilac's POV*

I have everything I could wish for: friends, popularity, money and looks

I might sound vain or self obsessed, but I'm really not.. I'm the opposite. I'm insecure. Deep down I know I'm not all looks.. All thanks to my dad. But I'll get to that later.

I hang around the 'popular' group around school. I love being popular, I love having friends; but then again who doesn't?

My two best friends are, Chloe and Jamie. Chloe has bright red hair and hazel eyes, and Jamie, which is a boy by the way, has blonde hair and emerald eyes.

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"Alright class settle down!" I heard miss Walters yell as I jogged to my form class (A/N: if you don't know what a form class is, it's the first classroom you go in where you get registered by your teacher)

I entered the classroom, and walked to my seat.

"Right I'm gonna take the register so I'm going to need all of you to be quiet" miss Walters said

"Freddie" Miss W asked

"Here" Freddie shouted

"Samantha" miss W said

"Yes" Samantha replied

After the registration was done, the class continued talking loudly. I turned around so that I'm facing Chloe

"Hey lilac, did you hear about the party on Saturday?" Chloe jumped excitedly

"What party?" I asked

"Oh my god! You haven't heard?! Apparently, josh hennings is going to throw the biggest house party, since his parents went off on holiday" Chloe explained as she waved her hands about

"I don't think I'm gonna go" I frowned

"Oh, that's a shame. I understand" Chloe hugged me

The last time I went to a party, I got groped and dragged into a spacious closet by a guy. I knew instantly he was going to force me into having sex with him when he put his hand up my top. Luckily, I screamed and Chloe was near by and she literally broke the door down and came to my rescue. I don't like talking about it, so only Chloe and Jamie know what happened that night.

The bell went, signalling that the registration finished.

"Oh class wait.." Miss W alerted the class, and every one stopped

"There'll be a new boy starting tomorrow, and I expect you to make him feel welcome.. Although I doubt he'll co operate with others" miss w said, mumbling the last bit to herself, that I only just heard.

My first lesson is science..urgh. This one of the lessons I hated because 1) neither Chloe or Jamie was in the same class and 2) I sat at a table where I was the only girl

I dragged myself to science class and walked through the door. I sat at the table where no one has arrived yet. I bring my planner out and pencil case. The second bell rang alerting the students, who haven't arrived to their class yet, that they'll be late to their class.

The other boys sat on my table, not noticing me, chatting. The teacher shushed every one and handed out sheets for us to work and fill in.

I despised my seat so much. I have a feeling that the teacher dislikes me and placed me at a table where I would feel out of place, seeing as every other person loved their seat.

I also hated my seat because of one the boys, Luke, can't stop bothering me. The other boys don't even take notice of me, which I'm glad of.

"So, are you going josh hennings party on Saturday then?" Luke whispered into my ear, trying to sound sexy but in reality he just sounded he had a very bad sore throat, I don't see the point in whispering when nearly all of the class was practically yelling at each other. The teacher took no notice and continued to 'work' on his laptop.

"No, and stop whispering in my ear when clearly you can talk out loud." I replied harshly

"I know you love it. And why not?" He chewed on his pen lid. Ew, do. Not, assume I 'love' it.

"Because.." I paused hoping he would drop it. But he just kept staring at me, looking for an answer

"Becausee..?" Luke repeated

"I have to study" I lied

"Ha! Course you do!," he said sarcastically "everyone knows you're one of the smartest here"

Great. Now he keeps track of me.

"I still have to study." I snap

"Whatever" Luke mumbled

For the rest of the lesson he made a few rude remarks, but I ignore him and kept working.

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After a few lessons, it was lunch. Finally! I was starving.

I jogged to the cafeteria where I bought a salad and blueberry muffin with pure orange juice. I'm on a diet. In the past, I was really fat. But ever since I turned 12, my dad started to physically abuse me. He beated me and kept saying things like: 'you're worthless', 'fat shit', 'disappear, you're unwanted, you cow'. My mum had no control, so one Christmas I asked for a treadmill, where I could exercise everyday, to get thin. I was so desperate to be skinny I starved myself, and kept making myself throw up, I lost a significant amount of weight which caused me to pass out one day.

I went to the hospital, where I got nutrition vaccinations to help me get healthy. A month later, I got healthy, however I gained a lot of weight again. Which caused me to cycle over to starvation and bulimia, fortuently, I kept it under control so I wouldn't end up in the hospital again. But I decided I needed to stop and keep eating. But only healthy stuff.

Anyway back to the cafeteria. I found my usual groupie around a different table. I sat down where everyone was gossiping about the upcoming party.

"Hey Jamie" I greeted

"Oh hey lilac!" Jamie said cheerfully. I smiled at the fact that he's always happy and cheery

"Lilac, why don't you ever treat yourself and eat a cake or something?" He curiously asked. Neither Jamie nor Chloe, or anyone, knew about my starving and bulimia.

"I like to be healthy" I half lie. Sometimes I hated being healthy so much. I often find myself looking into a cake or sweet shop. But I quickly get reminded by my fat-self.

The rest of the school day went on. The usual gossip and rumours went around. The day seemed like ages before it finished. I sighed of relief when it was the end of the day.

I said my goodbyes to my friends and took the bus home.