Taking control

Once upon a time I knew what love was. It was pure, real, honest and consuming. The reason I got out of bed and sometimes the reason we stayed in the bed. I had never felt anything like that, the way he made me... whole. We never had an easy care free love, no what it was passionate and often time tempers flared, jealousy was high, but we could not be without each other; or so I thought.

"It's over James." I doubted he would hear me, speaking barely over a whisper as tears slowly leaked out of my traitorous eyes. I summoned the will power to stop my body from shaking and to give in to the screaming my heart was demanding I let out with every break it was suffering. Slowly I summoned the courage to stand on weak legs and turned for the door handle wanting to escape the pain that was consuming me, but terrified that if I left I would never see him again.

"Caroline if you walk out that door we are over. I don't understand why you just don't forgive me. It was one girl. People cheat on each other all the time and get over it!" James yelled while angrily stomping around. He'd already accused me of cheating and lying before it slipped out that it was him. Frozen he sat staring at me with an unreadable look in his eyes before trying to make me see it was my fault. My fault he'd cheated and it would be my fault if I ended things tonight.

One hand resting on the door knob, my mind started to make its presence known trying to save what was left of my shattered heart and just when I was about to give in it hit me he said it was MY fault? In that moment that heartache vanished and a surge of rage filled my entire body and the scene I had stumbled upon earlier flooded my vision. I turned and slapped him with every ounce of strength I had! The loud pop echoed throughout the room, snapping out of forgiving him and giving me the strength I needed to walk away.

I walked out of the house, got into my car and drove away. I knew I was breaking the speed limit and it was dangerous, but at the moment in time I just didn't care. Somehow I made it safely home and inside like I was in a trance, an invader in my own body. I moved like a robot preparing for bed and it wasn't until the lights were out and I laid my head down that I snapped out of it; he cheated on me, I broke it off and I hit him. I raised my hand to wipe the shocked tear when the moonlight caught in the ring on my left hand and then all the tears I had fought to keep at bay came flooding out. It was cathartic, painful, suffocating and relief all in one giant blow. I couldn't handle the rush if emotions so I did what I always do I shut my mind off, let the tears fall as they wished and waited for sleep to take it all away.


So this is the first story I have ever attempted to share. Comment please. Let me know how you feel about it. Should I continue?