Turn Away

Ch@pter 8

"Sooo you aren't mad at me?"

"No girl I'm not mad at you," he chuckled.

"Then come give me a hug old man,"

He chuckled and gave me a hug..

"Everything's good in here?" Amanda poked her head in.

"Yeah, everything's fine," I semi-smiled.

Everyone came back in the room except Chris and Michelle. Speaking of her she and I made up, she said "almost" losing me today made her realize that life was too short to be holding grudges. Oh and she made me and Lili Godmothers of her bsby girl, her name is Karmin😍

"How you feelin' babeh," August held my hand.

"I feel a little tired, and my head hurts," I frowned.

Honey walked up to my bed with tear stained eye's, awww my poor baby😭

"Don't ever do that again Nelle, you had me-well everyone else so scared, we thought we were gonna lose you when you passed out," she sniffed.

"It's a good thing they brought you here in time, my name is Dr. Marcus,"

"Hi Dr. Marcus, um I would like to know what happened? Why did I pass out?"

"The reason you passed out is because, you didn't do your breathing techniques Ms. Whites, and you also didn't have your inhaler,"

"Breathing techniques? I was never told about breathing techniques. Matter of a fact I've never had to do any breathing techniques, so there's something wrong," i swallowed.

"You are right about that Ms. Whi-..please just call me Chanelle," o rolled my eyes.

"Calm down.." August whispered in my ear.

"As I was saying, you are indeed right about that Chanelle, while you were unconscious, we ran a few tests on you to see what had caused this to happen and we have found some horrible horrible results," he started hard at me.

"Wait what do you mean Doc," August asked.

"Instead of finding the same results as last time, we found that you now have a disorder called "panic anxiety disorder" which caused your mind to twist up your thoughts and panic rapidly on relatable events from your past or recent events that you are reminded of,"

In the corner of my eye I saw August put his head down..

"I'll go get your treatments and contact your therapist," he walked out.

It was dead silent, everyone was shocked..mainly me. I don't understand how do I go from bad to worse? I thought I was actually doing good!

I shook my head disappointed at myself. Disappointed that I let myself get this far, disappointed that I wasn't taking care of myself like I was supposed to, disappointed that I let everyone down.

I looked at August who still had his head down, and only I know he think it's his fault.

"August.."

...

"August look at me..."

he shook his head "no"...

"Please? For me.." I whispered.

He looked up at me with guilty eye's..

"Stop lookin' at me like that, it's not your fault," stared into his eye's.

He stared back into mines without saying anything..

"Um I think they want some privacy, come on let's leave them alone," Amanda stood up.