Decided?

Late Night Thoughts

My phone suddenly lit up my face leaving my eyes blinded.

Friday: 3 AM

I sighed. Waking up in the middle of the night is the actual worst. A cool breeze swept my room leaving me shivering. God I hate Michigan bipolar weather, I thought. Arguing if I should sleep or stay up, I decided it wouldn't hurt to stay awake. And, today is the big day! For some odd reason, I wasn't a tad excited of having my nikah this evening with my Middle School "crush", Youssef Qadri.

Youssef...
The thought of him sends butterflies in my stomach. With dark blue mysterious eyes, dirty, warm blonde hair, and a beautiful face structure with a jawline that can slice a watermelon, he checks off my list for a "21st Century Dream Husband". He is well-built and extremely buff, leaving all the girls at my academy drooling. And most importantly, he is a devote muslim that willingly decided to stay in an Islamic Academy to keep his Deen and Iman strong. I told you! Everything that a Muslim girl can ever wish for.

I never knew he was interested in me until he asked for my hand in marriage last April. I can remember it like yesterday. It was after a typical, annoying day at hell (highschool). I had taken a test in Mrs. Hrishita's class, and was confident that I actually did well in Science for once. That was until I received an enormous 0, after asking my friend, Sadeen how she did. The whole class had started laughing along with Youssef, and I felt like living under a rock for a year (or two). However, I came home to find my twin brother, Malik, with the cheekiest smile on his face. I totally had ignored him after the incident that day, and went to hide in my room from society. That was until I decided to join my family at dinner time, where I heard the GREAT NEWS, in which I was starstruck for a week.

I don't know why I'm not excited at the moment, but my sixth sense is telling me something is up. I had made istikhara the day I received the overwhelming news, so I decided I probably was just nervous. This was the day I would give up my "I'm single lady" lifestyle and grow as an independent woman.

I chose to run away from all marriage topics on my mind, and try to focus on school for once. In less than two months, I would be graduating out of highschool! These four long years wouldn't have passed by if it wasn't for Aceil, she truly was the sister I never had. Or Ayah and Sadeen, the realest and funniest. I just can't believe this year has passed by so fast! On top of that, for the first time since kindergarten, I was beyond excited to attend school today. Being a Friday I knew the school day would consist of chatting parrot-like, and last minute planning for my nikah with Aceil (Mrs. Hrishita was on vacation!!!). I JUST COULDNT WAIT, THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR MY WHOLE LIFE...

Suddenly, I started hearing noises in the bathroom next door. I got up with my pillow as my only weapon and tiptoed out my door. The banging kept getting louder and louder. My heart was beating like I had run a mile. I sighed in relief. It was Malik sleepwalking again, and this time involved banging on the bathroom door. I tapped his back a couple of times until he was awake, and walked him back to his room. I'm such responsible, good sister, I thought out loud.
Malik was my only brother, and it has just been the two of us. Sure he was annoying, aggravating, and purely evil (the list goes on), but he really cared for me and I thanked Allah everyday for bringing him into my life.(Cheesy but I truly did) It was going to be depressing leaving  him, we have been partners in crime for 18 years!

I lazily walked back to my room, and checked my phone unintentionally, and was stolen by the world of YouTube.

Friday 4:44 AM

Wow time passes by fast!

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Author's Note
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