It Must Have Been Love

Manila Envelops and Memories

August/2016: Ex-lovers. [ChickLit]
Prologue

It's here.

The engine of the mail truck faded deep down further into the rich class vicinity. Anxiety. That was one of the emotions I felt that I could put my finger on. I had been so attuned to that voice that I could recognise it from anywhere. It wasn't that hard really.

In a rich area like this, the only sound you hear is of the purr of expensive looking cars. So when there is noise as loud as a tractor engine, it means the mail truck is on it's way.

I put my steaming cup of coffee down on the shiny granite counter and walked reluctantly towards the door, fearing what's waiting ahead for me.

Usually the mail would strike me with nothing but pure happiness what with all coupons and invitations to fancy parties. Occasionally, it also included the electricity and all the other bills.

But never in my horrid nightmares did I imagine this to come.

I opened the red mailbox with cartoon stickers on them and decided to ignore the memories attached to it. Pulling out the mails from it, I discarded all of the unimportant ones. My hands clutched tightly onto the last mail.

Looking down, I found the papers wrapped up or probably dumped into a brown Manila envelope, the edges of which were damaged.

Just. Like. That.

As if this isn't a divorce and it does not affect him. Not even in the simplest bit. Like it hasn't destroyed many lives and isn't here to do the same to mine.

I shake my head in disappointment. Why am I letting him get to my head? It's only surounding me with dreadful vibes and drowning me in my own sea of hopes.

Taking a deep breath, I tricked my heart into thinking that everything is alright.

We have already discussed about this.

After staring at the sealed paper envelope in my hands and emitting a life long desired sigh, I closed the mailbox and walked into the house.

Surely, the serenity is nice but honestly, it feels nothing like home. The silence and the emptiness annoy me. My solitare which has been my best friend for the couple of past weeks will soon leave me after everyone else finds out.

I utter a low, heart breaking and mind piercing scream in frustration.

It echoes around and ricochets off the walls making the scream come back to my own ears. Torturing me relentlessly.

This is not how everything was supposed to end. This is not how we were supposed to end. The ultimatum is currently just devoid of colour.

We were alleged to be forever and always.

Raking my hands through my knotted hair, I let out a barely audible groan. Letting out a scream is not good. I should be over him by now.

'Yet, You're not.' a small voice in the back of my mind whimpers.

I carry myself to my room almost robotically. I haven't brushed my hair yet - or even visited the washroom. That is because of my habit of checking the mail first thing in the morning.

Little did I know, today it would simply ruin my day and my life along the way - throwing everything into deep waters.

I breathe out a deep sigh in vanity and pull the door open to the bedroom.

Closing my eyes, I blindly drag myself in front of my full length mirror, not even wanting to glance at my private den.

This room is just a reminder of how much of a failure I am in life.