For you (Spn x Male!Reader) [It's Bad, It's Cringy.]

Chapter 1: The deal

I met Dean in highschool. I hated him at first. He seemed like the type who would flirt with girls just for his amusement. The new kid who's only there to play with their hearts. I was wrong.

My thought about him changed when he saved me from demons, the same day I discovered that a "sword of Damocles" was hanging over my head. I witnessed the death of my parents. So much blood was in front of me. My only family, was dead. I was devastated.

Dean has been so kind with me, he showed a face of him we didn't see in school. The cool joking guy was now so serious. He knew what it was like to lose someone close to you, the memory of his childhood house,Mary's coffin, still burning in his mind. His father, still alive, was always absent. He pitied me, the innocent teenager who had no idea of the dangers of this world, crying openly in front of him. The truth is that we were both scared.

He had then done something his father had disapproved of, it was a sort of rebellion, him who always obeyed the orders: he proposed me to come with him and Sammy. Saying that I would never be safe alone. But I guess it was also because Dean and me was seeking something: revenge (at least I thought it was revenge). And we will fight, side to side, to get it.

I accepted. I started living with Dean, and Sammy, the boy that I treated as my own little brother. The older Winchester taught us howt o fight. Time have passed. I were alone with Dean, Sam have gone studying. They grow up so fast...

When John came back one day he had argued with Dean about me being here. Dean had answered that Sam had chosen to go studying, so he too had the right to chose, for once, who and what he wanted in his life. His dad, after being silent for a moment, told him that I could stay here, at two conditions: I was not going to hunt with them, and at the first wrong thing I did, Dean would never see me again. John didn't say anything about me after that. He was just giving me cold stares, full of hatred. I didn't know why. I wanted to tell him that he was hurting both his sons. That he only saw in Dean a hunter, a "partner" to kill things. And that it would be the same with Sam, if he was still there. But I didn't dare, I was too afraid to ruin the little time they had together.

And when John disappeared, it all went downhill from here.

So much things had happened, it's all blurry with stains of alcohol. I've fallen in love with Dean. I could have saved him. I first have loosen my parents, then Sam, who was brought back by his brother. His brother who had to paid the price. And he was gone, forever.

I spent my days drinking. Bobby, who knew what I felt for Dean, tried to dissuade me at first, but eventually gave up. He was only making sure that I slept and ate enough. Even if he perfectly knew that I only wanted my body to crumble. Sam was gone god knows where, chasing monsters by himself.

And Dean came back one day. I thought I could die of happiness. I kept thanking Castiel and promised Bobby to stop drinking and to live healthily. Sam came back too. My family was here again. I was happy again. Everything was going to be fine.

One day I decided that I should confess to Dean, tell him all the feelings hidden deep in my heart. It was during a hunt. We were both alone. I was blushing, my heart was beating so fast. I said that I loved him for so long. But the answer felt like being stabbed in the heart, into an already opened injury. Bleeding. I felt like I was losing him again.

"Sorry, I'm not into guys" Dean was still talking but I couldn't listen. My ears was ringing, the world seems to collapse around me. It hurts. I watched Dean's lips moving. I could never kiss them. I was never going to hear them saying "I love you" to me. They weren't mine and were never going to be. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I jumped. The contact burned.

"Are you okay ? Do you understand ?" Dean asked worryingly. I gulped and answered with a fake smile, my voice above a whisper.

"Yes don't worry, I understand" Dean nodded although he perfectly knew that I wasn't okay.

When the hunt was finished, we got back to the bunker. Sam knew that something had happened by the look on our face, but he didn't say anything.

I said that I was tired and was going to sleep until tomorrow. An excuse to go crying. Dean was still going to be my friend. It was okay as long as he was by my side.

But at 2A.M, I had took one of the most stupidest decision of my life. I couldn't ignore the love I felt for him. If Dean preferred women, I will become one. I got up and took everything I needed. Making sure everyone were asleep, I got out of the bunker and rode my motor bike in the dark night. There was no stars, no moon, it was hidden by clouds. It was going to rain soon. I drove to a crossroad and buried the small box. I heard a voice I knew all too well behind me.

"If I ever thought that you were one to make a deal..." I turned around and saw a man in a suit.

"Crowley"I said coldly

"The only one, what do you want ?"

"Turn me into a woman." the demon frowned.

"Why would you want to be woman ? You're perfect the way you are !" he was surprised as I grabbed him by the collar, bringing him closer to my face.

"I'm not! Beside you're a freaking demon, the king of all of them, it's your job to make deal, now do it !" Crowley put both his hands up in defense.

"Okay, okay, calm down...A woman, uh ? Why ?"

I dismissed the question.

"I want to look like those women Dean flirt with, long hair, great shapes,big breast, and put clothing too." the demon lift an eyebrow.

"Dean ? Why, someone want to-"

"Shut up and do it already !"

"You made a bad decision"

As I was going to reply, Crowley kissed me. I was disgusted. My body felt weird. I closed my eyes. I was suddenly afraid of what I've just done.

"Well see you in, let's say...five years, have fun with your new body !"

When I opened my eyes, the king of Hell was gone. I looked down. Breast feels weird. The clothing were very revealing: a short and a tanktop. What was this thing I felt when breathing ? Was it...? I looked inside my tank top and made a face. He even thought about the bra. Of course he would, I heard women say that bras were a torture. Thank god (did I still have the right to use this expression ?) I have converse and not high heels. But I guess I'll have to buy some... I took my phone out and looked at my face. I was surprised and started crying. I was beautiful. My features were now so pretty. Nothing like my handsome manly feature from before. Finally he would love me. All bad feelings gone, I drove back to the bunker, just as the rain started to fall.