If you've ever been in a relationship with me, I'm sorry. One day i want you and the next I'm pushing you away. I've been this way forever. You see, when i was younger and even now, my dad walked in and out of my life. But every single time there was a trail of broken promises, etc. In most cases, the parent won't leave for long but in my case, my dad would leave for months maybe a year or years at a time. I was used to getting my hopes up and then being let down. Now, i just don't like letting people get close. At all.
I'm scared. Scared to let people love me or let myself love someone else. It's like you want to, but your emotions shut off and you just stop caring because it's not like you can let yourself truly love that one person. Well, I did it once. But I messed that up. I did things to keep that person away so they wouldn't want to be close. Things are complicated. I wish I didn't hurt that person. I wish I did things differently. I wish i could just stop being so damn stubborn and let that person love me. But I can't and I won't at this point in time. I hope you're reading this and to you, I am sorry.
YOU ARE READING
It all started with this
Non-FictionI'm letting you guys in. I don't do that at all and i want to work on it. This is why i am the way I am.
