My Life As A Book

Chapter 3

I moved to Ashburnham when I was eight years old. I immediately knew I was going to love it there. Sure, it was a ways away from Fitchburg, but the further the better. I remember on the way up I asked Marcus if we were going to be closer to my grammy, who lived in Leominster. He just laughed his melodic giggle and replied with a cheeky yes. Relief flooded over me. I don't know why I needed to know this, at the time I wasn't particularly close with my grammy. But then again, I wasn't really close with anybody.
When we finally suffered through the ride in the blazing heat, we arrived at our new house. I fell in love with it. I had already seen the inside, and had even helped paint the walls. There was just something about it at the time, and now, that just lured me in. Avoiding the dreadful unloading of the moving van, I walked around the neighborhood introducing myself. There were 2 houses out of many that I knew I was going to visit many times, both with children younger than I. There was Erin and Hailey, whom I spent most of my time with, and Vecilia, whom I regret ever introducing myself to. (She's real mean now). After I went around, it was time to go back. All of my boxes were already in my room. I unpacked, carefully placing my favorite stuffed animals on the bed. I remember the first stuffed animal I had ever gotten was from Marcus when I first met him all those years ago. Great memories turned sour by a single moment, I guess. Beside that, I loved this new house and I could already feel the generosity of the community greeting me.

My first day at Briggs was kind of interesting. I got lost a few times before I found Mrs. Bastille's third grade classroom, but I was new. There were people flowing into the previously unoccupied rooms, and each one greeted me with a warm smile. This was great. Acceptance. Something I longed for. The rest of the year was just as eventful, with handfuls of people trying to befriend me. I was loving life. I left third grade with a great feeling of joy. In addition to this, I had met my best friend. It was a weird meeting, however. I was getting off the bus when some kid came flying down the hill on his bike. He tried to stop (or so he said), but ended up hitting me still. It didn't hurt much, but the look of concern on his face sold me. I assured him I was fine. I then introduced myself to him, finding out his name, Brandon, and then walking up the road to my house. So I guess hitting me with a bike=friendship.
\(0-0)/

When I was nine, and in fourth grade, my cat Pumpkin died. He was 16 years old. I was heartbroken. My first friend was gone. I watched him die, he was sick and I knew it, but I didn't think the inevitable would come so soon. He passed in my bed on my pillow, and to this day I have not washed it. It still smells like him: cinnamon and catnip. An odd combination, but something I occassionally long for. When I have a bad day I lay my head on the pillow and it reminds me of the good times in life. The days with him. After it happened I didn't want to come out of my room for days, for I believed that he was still close if I was.

When I was ten and in the fifth grade, my life was slowly falling apart. My cousin Kaitlyn was in the hospital. I wasn't allowed to visit, which ripped my heart in two. My mom didn't even have the heart to tell me that she was there due to an attempted suicide. I didn't know that piece until a couple months ago. I saw the bandages on her arms from time to time, but I didn't know much about that sort of thing.
As if that wasn't enough, Marcus left my mother. After 7 years, he finally racked up enough courage to let her go. I heard them yelling outside through my bedroom window. I cried myself to sleep that night for the first time in my life. In a way I thought it was my fault, why he left us. Then I thought I had been dreaming. Like it was some sick and twisted dream. I recall opening my mother's closet to help pack stuff up only to find her huddled in a corner crying. I hugged her and rested my head on her shoulder. Marcus had no idea what he had done.
When he left, we had to give up our house. My mother didn't have a job so we couldn't afford it. I remember going to stay at my dad's for a night while my mother figured out our situation. We were homeless. We ended up moving in with my grandparents, and I thought I was going to have to switch schools. Luckily school choice was an option for me. Starting middle school at Overlook in the fall was destined to be my future in education. We also had to give up our pets. Both cats (Stinker and Jack) and all three ferrets (Luigi, Duncan and Baley). Where we had to go didn't have enough room for them. Heck, there was barely enough room for us! I threw away most of my belongings, including all except one of my stuffed animals. The one I kept was the first one I ever got: my first gift from Marcus.

A/N
Sorry it's vague I had to literally stop myself every couple lines to take a deep breath. This was probably the biggest downfall of my life so far, and the mark he left on us will eventually scab over but for now it is still a very iffy subject. We never talk to him or about him. We don't say his name or talk about what he did.