I've only lived 19 years, but in that time, I've lied more than I can keep track of, some lies are on going and are disguised as the truth, judge me if you want but in my eyes, it was necessary. I did it to survive. To survive high school, dating, and to maintain my reputation. I wasn't a slut but I wasn't a prude either. If I'm counting correctly I've slept with 10 people since I started fucking at the age of 13, I know it's young but I had to mature fast, in many different ways. 4 out of the 10 thought I was a virgin and I convinced them that they were special enough to pop my cherry early when in reality I was just easy. Don't get me wrong, I cared for them, just not enough.
The reason I'm confessing to all of this isn't because I feel guilty or any kind of remorse, I'm telling my story because I have a reacquiring thought, more of a fear actually, that I'm going to die. I'm not afraid of death at all, in fact I welcome it, I'm afraid that when I die, my family and friends will be at my funeral, all telling stories about me, explaining who I was as a person, a sister, a daughter, and a friend, and I'll be watching them, listening... And I won't agree with any of it. That is my fear. That no one close to me, actually knows me. I'm beginning to realize that I don't even know myself... My cruel and unfortunate life has twisted my thoughts and drained me of who I was and now I am growing apart from myself.
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Growing apart
Novela JuvenilA story about a girl who, at a young age, would wear dresses, hug her family and say I love you. As she grew, she grew apart from herself, with depression, abuse, a bad temper and poor sexual choices all being a factor, she lost who she was. Now she...
