There Comes a Time

There comes a time in every person's life when they ask one of the big questions and it changes their life forever. It doesn't have to be the same question, it doesn't even have to be the same answer, but the result is always the same. A life is changed but whether that is positively or negatively depends on the individual. It depends on you. The change doesn't have to be big or noticeable, and often times you don't even realise your life has changed, the potential for so many possibilities so great you can never guess where your life was originally heading or where you'll eventually end up. And other times you know the very second your life has changed. When you have changed. And you know nothing will ever be the same again. And you don't want it to be.

That's what travelling with the Doctor is like. One minute you're a journalist, a student, a piper, and the next you're a Child of Time running, running, running from everything and nothing. You run because you can, because you have to, because you know if you stop you'll have to acknowledge that this is only temporary, and even though you may return to your old life, you'll never just be a journalist, a student, a piper again. Your heart will always remain with that man and his ship, and though you may be forced to forget it, your mind and heart and soul will never let it go. Whether you asked to join the team, was invited, or stowed away, the result will always be the same. By stepping inside that magic box, you realise a part of you that was missing has been returned, and even when you step out of it for the last time, you know that part will always remain with that mad old man. And a part of him will forever remain with you. Until the end of time and beyond.

You might not know all of his past, and he might not know all of yours, but your lives will forever be intertwined. Past, present, and future, for time is not linear, and though it may be at times dangerous, it can be rewritten. If you are prepared for the consequences. But through it all he will be there, an unstoppable force, holding your hand even when you are parted. The Oncoming Storm. Fire and ice and everything terrifying and wonderful. And you trust him, trust him more than you ever thought was possible, even though it is said his one true companion since the beginning and to the end is Death itself. Willingly you fall into his embrace, willingly you defy odds and do whatever possible for even a glimmer of acceptance and pride in his eyes, willingly you would pull the trigger. And he knows it. And it destroys him.

You unknowingly wait your entire life for him to open those blue blue doors and extend his hand to you, waiting for those words to fall from his lips, waiting for the emptiness inside you to be filled with his fantastic brilliance. He is everything you want to have, want to be, want to keep, and yet you know deep down one day you must let go. And that also destroys him. Eyes so old in a face so young, for even a face lined with wrinkles is young compared to his eyes, and it almost physically hurts you to witness the years weighing him down. Though at times cocksure and exuberant, you can catch sight of the lingering darkness polluting everything you thought you knew about him, the vengeance, despair, and wrath of a Time Lord, of the last one of his kind bleeding through. And, oh, how his hearts bleed.

He lights up your life merely by being there, for however long he's around, be it days, years, or seconds. He is the sun you revolve around and the moon that orbits you just out of reach but constantly changing you. He is always everything and never nothing. The universe needs its Doctor.

And then he is gone. He has died and lived on so many times, even when his face and overt personality changes, you think him invincible, think him infallible. But he falls and he fails and he cannot live forever. One day he will be unable to cheat death one more time. His light will go out, his song will end, and time and space and reality will have lost their saviour. The Angel of Mercy and the Angel of Death all wrapped up into one. Gone. It will only be a matter of time until all else follows him. And you know. And so you fight. Fight with everything you have. Fight with everything. For everything. For him.

For just as you have given a part of yourself to him, he has given a part of himself to you. And as long as you live, so does he through and in and around you. You will become the Doctor in his stead, joined and completed by the Children of Time, and together you will fight and run and be always everything and never nothing. The universe needs you. And you will defend it.

So now is the time to ask yourself that question. One of countless possibilities.

Are you ready?