Virgin Queries

7. Lines

“Can I peek?”  Paxton weighed the options in his head.  It really couldn’t hurt to let the boy see what people were curious about.  He nodded and turned his phone sideways.  The screen rotated and they were both able to see the font grow just a bit.

Dear V,

Prom is coming up soon for my friends, and I really want to go, but I’m unsure if it’s worth the risk.  I ran away from everything I knew to be with the guy I care so much about, and I would love to show him where I came from.  I’ve been saving up for a time like this, and he has quite a bit of money as well.  Do you think it would be a good relationship builder if we returned to my hometown?  I’m scared that if we go back, the people there will just judge me for what I’ve done and who I am, and this new ‘being me’ thing is so new that I don’t want to be hurt.  I would really love to hear what you think.  Thanks.

 

“That’ll be a tough one.  I say she – or he – should just come back over and see how things are.  I’ve learned that if you have someone you care about next to you, it doesn’t matter what anyone else says,” August said quietly, looking at Paxton out of the corner of his eye.  Paxton nodded quietly, his heartbeat increasing.

“I…” he cleared his throat, “I agree with you.  About the advice and the whole being with someone you care about part.  It really doesn’t matter what they say.”  August smiled and tapped the screen to favorite the question.

“I think you should definitely answer that one.  Meanwhile, I’m gonna read this book and find out why men date bitches.”  Paxton smiled.  That was actually one of his favorite books from the set he’d gotten from the bookstore.  The two sat in silence for half an hour, typing on the small keyboard and flipping through the crisp pages.  Paxton’s ears perked up when he heard the notification sound on his phone.  He opened the new email and read over it quickly.

Dear V,

Something very strange is going on with me.  Normally I don’t feel this way about people, but I can’t help it.  Something about this guy makes me so eager to do whatever he asks.  I can’t wait to spend more time with him, as embarrassing as that is to admit.  I’ve dated both boys and girls in the past, but this boy, this shaggy, red-haired ginger boy keeps popping into my head.  He’s funny, he’s witty, and he’s as caring as can be.  He stands up for what he believes in, he doesn’t let anyone push him around, and though he can be quick-tempered and fiery in a flash, he still has an air about him that draws me to him.  He’s pretty damn awesome as you can see.  The crappy part is that this is the only way I could think to tell him.  To tell you.  It’s not romantic at all, but I never was Ryan Gosling.  So, this is me telling you, Pax, that you’re pretty great, and I can’t stop thinking about you.

 

Paxton stared at the email silently, a smirk slowly growing on his face.  He turned to face August, aiming his phone in the direction of the boy as well.  “August?” he asked, his eyebrow cocked playfully.

“Hm?” August replied, grinning bashfully.

“Did you email V?”

“Possibly.  Why do you think that’s me?”

“Oh, I dunno.  ‘So, this is me telling you, Pax, that you’re pretty great, and I can’t stop thinking about you’?”  August laughed, leaning in to put his head on Paxton’s shoulder.

“How do you feel about that?” he asked, nuzzling his shoulder with amusement.  Paxton grinned.

“I feel good.”

“Good, then.”

“Good.”  He leaned his own head against the top of August’s, closing his eyes for a moment.  He breathed in the smell of the boy.  He was the physical embodiment of cigarettes and peach.  Paxton slowly turned his nose to graze his hair, sighing deeply.  The two sat quietly for a few moments, listening to the silence.  After ten minutes, Paxton heard the soft breaths of sleep.  He looked down to see August asleep against his shoulder.  He smiled softly and ran his fingers over August’s hand.  They were softer than he’d imagined.  Slowly, Paxton ran his index finger across his boney knuckles and down his fingers, watching the short black hairs on his skin bend under his touch.

His chest felt full, completely and utterly filled to the brim.  Paxton was unsure if he could trust this feeling.  Too many times had he felt like his heart would leap out of his throat.  Too many times had he been blindsided.  He tried with every ounce of his ability to stop the warmth he felt being close to August.  But as his hand curled around Paxton’s index finger, his breath stopped and he knew he was already in too deep.  He couldn’t pull away.  He laced his fingers through August’s and closed his eyes once more.