I Need You Here With Me

Chapter Three

What Tomorrow Brings

Ian’s POV

It took me five minutes after I heard Anthony leave to stop crying, and during there were racing thoughts that filled me with dread. Is he really going to the hospital? Is he going to believe I’m-I’m this way…? What is he going to think of me now? Will he think I’m more of a freak than a friend? We’ve known each other for so long and we’ve never known about my condition, and now that he will know, where will he place our friendship? Will it start to die off because I’m just too bizarre to handle? We’ve been best friends for most of our lives, but can Anthony survive seven more months of the new me? How many more times will I cry from being pregnant? Is it because of all the estrogen my body is releasing? That shit makes women cry all the time. It’s hard for men to cry…but if it wasn’t the hormones, would I still be in tears from such horrible news? Why am I asking all these questions when I have no answers…? In the silent house I sat on my bed doing nothing except for waiting for Anthony to come home.

Even though the knocking sound was quiet, it made me open my eyes and wake up when I didn’t even know I fell asleep. Last time I had my eyes open, my room was lit with daylight, but now it was dim like it was almost night. And it was when I tiredly checked my phone and saw that it was 5:38PM. I was asleep for four hours? Another few light knocks was followed by a very soft: “Ian…” from beyond my door. It was Anthony, and by the sound of it he wasn’t angry at me. Oh, god…this is it…isn’t it? There was no room for sadness I should have been feeling; there was only fear that ran through my veins and hit my heart over and over as I walked to the door. I gulped when I slowly opened it and me and Anthony’s eyes met. He looked just as scared as I did, but he had room for sadness by the deep frown on his face. “Ian…so I went to your doctor when I left.” His words were said so slowly and quietly, like that moment was filled with tragedy. “Okay…” He was supposed to continue but looked like he couldn’t. It was too bizarre for him to fully comprehend.

His sparkling brown eyes fell and gazed at the floor, and I could tell he was struggling to find the right words. But first he unzipped my jacket and pulled up my shirt some to place his right hand on my stomach, making sure the news he heard was right. He got closer to inspect it, and his eyes went wide when he saw the slight bump that normally wouldn’t have been there, and his fingers gently pushed at it, immediately getting pushed back since there was definitely something in there. “We never knew…” He murmured to me, standing up straight to face me again. “Nope. I’m relieved that I didn’t find out at an early age…I thought I was normal all this time.” In the moments of quiet that followed, Anthony stepped into my room and wrapped his arms around my neck, hugging me in the mushy moment. “You’ve never been normal, Ian. But at least you’re okay. You’re not dying. Not sick. You’re just…pregnant…”  I felt his relief but I remembered all those questions I asked myself when I was alone.

He let go of me before I said seriously: “As the months wear on, I was told that I’m going to continue to have morning sickness, I would still be tired, my emotions will be erratic at times, and I would be all achy and stuff. You’ve been my best friend for who knows how long, but will you stay here throughout it all? I need you here with me.” The sly grin he gave me made me feel like I just asked a dumb question. “Psh, where the hell else am I supposed to go? We live together. But I know that you mean to support you. Even though it’s hard for me to fully understand I’m gonna wake up every morning and remind myself that you’re Ian Hecox, not some man weirdo. I’ll be there you for whenever you need me, man.” If we were both women, his heart-warming speech would have made us cry but being rough men, I put my hand on his shoulder and nodded. “Awesome. Now make me some dinner, I’m starving!” Anthony gave me a huge scoff. “Tch, you’re not that sick! I can make a healthy dinner, but you better help out now that you’re not dying!” Aw, fuck.