I'm Not A Fool

•4•

"Jackson, are you coming to Elisha's party tonight?" Toby cut me off in my adventure through the halls, my heart instantly skipping a beat as I was drawn into his eyes, the icy blueness dragging me into the frosty orbs of emotion that could be held in that swirling abyss. His eyes. I hadn't spoken to this beautiful boy that much. We've shared a few heart-felt conversations that consisted of "Can I copy your homework?"

"Um.. You mean- Elisha Adams?" Of course, Elisha Adams, you dumb piece of crap. There isn't another Elisha in this school and she is one of the most popular girls in this whole school.

"Yeah." He let out a breathy chuckle.

I lied directly to Toby, trying to see if he would accept me as a human, maybe. I knew nothing at all about this party. Completely clueless. "Of course! Who isn't going? It's gonna be like.. off the chain hook!" What the actual-

He nodded, suspiciously. "Nice. Well, see you around." Toby began confidently walking away, his black vans tapping against the floor, mesmerizing me. Then I remembered. I do not even know where this person lives or how to get there.

Out of instinct, I immediately yelled,"Toby, wait!" His blonde hair flipped across his forward, peering at me with a worried expression. "Do you think you could send me the address? I-I lost it." Another lie.

"Sure." He whipped out his phone, swiping as I awkwardly stood before him. I am usually quite a confident, extroverted person, but when I get around Toby, my body just shuts down and nothing quite comes out right. "Okay, what's your number?"

My heart instantly stopped. Toby Armstrong, himself, wants my number in the almighty device in his hand.

"Oh.. Yeah." I stuttered out my number as his delicate fingers slowly punched in each digit.

"Just sent it! See you there, Jackson." He grinned, strutting away in all his glory. Dear God, he's a beauty.

~

I peered into the mirror, slicking my hair back with a comb and observing the form of each strand.

"No. You have to look casual and effortless for a party. That is what everyone is expecting from you. You are a pretty big deal around this school and people can't see you looking different from what is themed." I thought to myself.

I patted down my clothes, peering into the mirror once more before grabbing my bag and exiting my house.

I finally arrived at the house, the speakers muffled from the outside. I took a sharp breath in before twisting the handle of the door and entering into the atmosphere of booming music and drunk teens. The air was filled with smoke and laughter. To the left of me sat the minority of people who wish they weren't there and were sat on the couch, munching on chips and dip. In front of me danced the ones who knew life was short and were not ready to waste it. That meant grinding, drinking and fun. To my right were the group of teens who were just drunk and horny, making out on counters, having open sex on a couch. Unspeakable things.

People greeted me with high fives, hugs, casual yells of my name from across the room, and drinks. Lots of drinks.

A few, twenty, shots later, my mind was mush. Everything was blurry. Everything was peaceful. I felt free, open to anything.

I stumbled across the floor, grasping onto the stairwell and almost falling. Someone grabbed onto my waist, chuckling before letting me face plant into the ground.

"You okay?" I peered up to see Toby, red cup in hand, staring down at me.

"Yeah. Haha..heh." I began to giggle uncontrollably. We were both drunk out of our minds.

"Want a.. refill?" He said, his light blue eyes trailing down to my empty cup.

"Yeah...yeah." He grabbed my hand, dragging me into the kitchen. I pulled myself onto the counter, sitting on the edge and closing my eyes. Toby placed my cup in my hand as I took a swig, setting it down. He nudged his way in between my legs, resting his forehead on mine.

"You're so hot." He whispered, the alcohol slipping off his tongue.

"But I'm really straight." I chuckled, him connecting our lips. He grinded up against me, causing friction between us. I tangled my fingers in his hair as he picked me up, wrapping my legs around his waist. I was so intoxicated.

Tossing me on the bed, he removed my shirt, trailing his tongue all over my torso. I moaned, gently biting near his collarbone.

My stomach turned as his fingers roamed my body. Not in a good way either. My eyes shot open as I began groaning. Toby continued to whisper dirty things in my ear as I winced.

It was too late now.

One last groan made chunks of chewed up food and alcohol spurt all over Toby and I, covering the bed. A warm putrid feeling of liquid was expelled around us, him tumbling back in horror. An acidic, bitter, tingling sensation was left in my throat. Toby was completely mortified by the entire horrendous situation folding out before him.

"You're disgusting!" Toby screamed, pulling on his clothes and hurriedly exiting the room.

I was alone in utter embarrassment.