Radio Waves (manxman)[Match Maker Series]

Chapter Twenty-five

Jake's POV

I cradled the phone on my shoulder and sorted my washing into the washing machine. I measured out the detergent then closed the machine and turned it on.

"It's so boring here without you. The girls have all disappeared to some spa to get facials or whatever the hell it is women do in those places and Wes is still gaga over the professor's son. I miss you, I miss hanging out and talking about silly little things." Gerard whined.

His words reminded me of the voicemail Gabe had left on my phone. I miss you. Such simple words that should have brought me comfort but they only hurt me more. If he truly loved me like he'd claimed to then he wouldn't have intentionally hurt me. I couldn't believe him now and I couldn't accept his apology. The hurt was too deep and my trust was broken. I'd trusted him not to hurt me but he had.

"You can talk about silly things with Match." I offered. "I'm sorry Gerard I just can't be there right now. There are too many memories everywhere I look." 

"I understand that. But you didn't just leave the campus and this town, you left us. We didn't do anything wrong but you're punishing us by staying away. We want to be there for you, that's what friends do." I could hear the hurt in his voice and I felt awful. I didn't want to hurt my friends.

"I'm sorry. Please just give me a little more time. I'll try again." I sighed into the phone. "I love you guys, you know?" I'd tried to go back twice in the three weeks that I'd been home but I didn't get far either time before having a panic attack. The last time though I'd made it all the way to the bus station didn't freak until I was first in the queue to buy a ticket. When I'd stepped up to the desk my vision had tunneled and I'd felt light headed. Luckily my dad had stuck around and he'd helped me to a seat before I'd completely embarrassed myself by doing something humiliating like fainting.

"We love you too. You know we have your back and when you feel well enough to come back we'll support you and we'll even kick his ass if you want us to."

I leaned back against the washing machine closed my eyes at the mention of Gabe. My friends were always careful not to mention him by name, not since the first ten times I'd cried at every mention of it. "I appreciate the sentiment but I don't want you guys to kick his ass." I steeled myself before asking, "Has he come around again?" 

"Every day like clockwork. He always goes to your room first though, like you're going to magically appear. I think that kid who moved in there has called campus security. It hasn't stopped him from doing it though. He knows it's not your room anymore, the kid told him but I guess he's just thick headed." I could hear Gerard taking a deep breath. "Victoria says he's in trouble at work. He's not turning up on time and when he does his heart's not in it so he sounds like a zombie broadcaster."

"I wouldn't know I haven't been listening to his show." My mind was sluggishly trying to process everything I'd just learned.

"I think he really is sorry. I've seen him, he looks awful..."

"I need to go my mom wants me to fix something for her. Talk to you later." I cut Gerard off and hung up the call. I didn't want to hear about Gabe anymore. I didn't want to know how he was doing or how he looked. I didn't want to feel sorry for him, he didn't deserve that. I didn't want to think about him at all.

But I did.

I couldn't stop thinking about him. About us. I missed us, him, like nothing I'd ever missed before. I was a shell without him, a hollow empty shell. If you held me to your ear you'd hear the ocean of tears I'd cried over him. 

I left the little room that served as the laundry room and went in search of my mother. She actually did want me to fix something for her so that hadn't really been a lie. I found her in the kitchen washing the floor. I stopped in the doorway knowing that if I stepped foot into the room she'd scold me like a child. "Hi Mom. I have my laundry in the machine so I have some time to fix whatever it is you need fixed." She hadn't been clear on what it was.

She looked up from cleaning and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "Oh, hi honey. I'll be finished here in just a minute then we can go into town and I'll tell you."

Into town? Why would we need to go into town for her to tell me what was wrong or broken. Was it something to do with her car, because I knew nothing about cars.

I found myself being ushered into my mom's car and then we were on the way to town. It wasn't a long trip, maybe fifteen or twenty minutes before we pulled up outside the diner. "Let's get something to eat while we talk." I didn't bother replying, there was no point in arguing with my mother. 

I looked at the menu, none of the items tickling my taste buds. I didn't have much of an appetite lately. I ended up just ordering fries and a burger with a strawberry shake. My mother had ordered some kind of grilled chicken salad and an iced tea. Our drinks arrived while we were waiting for our food and I pushed my shake to one side. My mom eyed the move through narrowed eyes and took a sip of her iced tea before saying, "You need to start eating and drinking properly, you're skin and bone."

I rolled my eyes. "I've always been thin Mom."

"Not this thin you haven't. I'm worried about you honey. You have dark circles around your eyes and you look malnourished. I haven't said anything before or probed into why you needed to come home but I can't stand back and watch you doing this to yourself. Your father is worried too, he's watched you fall apart each time you attempt to return to college. What's going on?" She reached out and held my hand in both of hers. "Tell me what's wrong."

The waitress returned with our food and we both silently picked at our meals. I pushed my fries around the plate before picking up the burger and taking a small bite. I put the burger back on the plate and almost gagged trying to swallow it. I sipped my shake trying to dislodge the lump of food.

I looked up and saw my mother's face creased in concern. I hated seeing her worry and knowing that I was the cause. It also made me think of Gabe's mom. I'd spoken to her a few days ago on the phone and she'd seemed to be in good form, but there was an underlying sense of worry in her voice. Everything seemed to be falling apart right now. My relationship, my friendships, Laura's health, though she assured me that she was feeling fine I still worried about her. Most of all my world was falling apart, crumbling to dust and I had no idea what to do or how to fix it. I felt a fat tear hit my cheek, then another. I couldn't fight them anymore and reached for the serviette dispenser. 

I dried my eyes as best I could and sniffled. Looking back up at my mother I finally told her, "Gabe and I have broken up." 

"I was afraid of that." My mother stood and rounded the table to sit beside me. Her arm came around my shoulders and then I was being tugged into her embrace. 

"Mom," I whined. "We're in public."

"I don't care. My baby is hurting."

I rolled my eyes but secretly relished the familiar warmth and scent of my mother wrapped around me. I loved her like crazy.

"Now we need to figure out what to do about your father." She mused aloud.

"Dad? What do you mean?" I asked in confusion.

My mother pulled back and bit her lip. I just knew I wasn't going to like whatever she had to say. "Your father has gone to see your friends. He didn't like seeing you this way anymore than I do so he wanted to get to the bottom of things. I told him to let me talk to you first but you know what your father is like. If your friends tell him about the break up I'm afraid he might go to see Gabe. If your father thinks he hurt you..." She let the sentence trail off. She didn't need to finish it. My father had a quick and explosive temper.

"I need to get back to campus, maybe I can intercept him." I pulled my phone out of my pocket and started dialing Gerard's phone. I threw some money on the table and left the diner with my mother right behind me and a ringtone in my ear.