On a Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHEN SLEEPING. (Me—but that's the only time I have to do my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (Me—The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial Soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (Me—wait! I don't know how to use soap!)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: Serving Suggestion: Defrost. (Me—but it's 'just' a suggestion.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): Do not turn upside down. (Well geez, buddy, a bit late for that now!)
On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Me—whoa whoa whoa—if you heat it, it's gonna be cold. Everybody knows that.)
On packaging for a Rowenta clothing iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (Me—but that would save me so much time!)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication. (Me—we could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents of we could just get the 5-year-olds with the head-colds off those forklifts)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. (Me—and I'm taking this because???...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (Me—as opposed to what? Outer space?)
On a Japanese food processor: Do not use for that other use. (Me—okay, so basically this means don't use your food processor as a wood chipper.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: Warning: Contains peanuts. (Me—WHAT?!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet. Eat nuts. (Me—Digest nuts. Go to the bathroom and release nuts.)
On a child's superman costume: Wearing this garment does not enable you to fly. (Me—That explains so much.)
I heart those...
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Hilarious Quotes
HumorJust some hilarious quotes that I lol'd at so many times... :D
