fifty-eight

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         Do you want to know what’s more fun than spending an afternoon with your family?

         Spending an afternoon with your family plus one hypochondriac, soon-to-be therapist. 

         We were sitting in the den.  He was on the sofa, I was on the rocking chair, a therapy in reverse, and, while he smiled intently at me, I remained absolutely silent, counting the seconds until I’d be able to leave this suffocating house.

         “Do you blame Mandy’s death on your own actions?”

    Bam, just like that, Odd-Todd turned first-date awkward into I-just-confessed-my-love-to-you awkward.

         What was I supposed to answer?

         He understood that I didn’t talk, right?  It just wasn’t my thing.

         “Xavier, you can talk to me.”

         No, I couldn’t.

         “No one here is going to hurt you.  You’re in a safe environment.”

         With Holt sleeping upstairs.

         “Do you regret what happened that night? Do you regret your behavior?”

         I regret Mandy’s reliance. 

         "Do you wish you could take it all back?”

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