Teenage Kings

Chapter Fifteen

     We made out for a while longer in Wesley's bedroom. He drove me home around eleven because his mother said it was time for me to go. If Laraine hadn't said anything, Wesley probably would have had me stay the night.

     He held my hand as we sat silently in his car. I did not speak, and not because I was nervous and not because I was at a loss of words, but simply because I did not know what to say. Wesley cleared his throat and spoke, putting an end to the awkward tension. 

     "So uh, what kind of music do you listen to?"

     His question hit me oddly at first. It was such a aimless question to ask. I replied with a cryptic tone. 

     "Pretty much everything." 

     Wesley nodded his head slightly and we let the awkward consume us again. It wasn't until a few moments later that I realized his reason for asking such an out-of-the-blue question. We knew nothing about each other. We were two strangers, two strangers who had just made out after only going out for one coffee date. I was going to fast with Wesley. I feel now, as though, maybe I should not have kissed him so soon. I wish I could have gotten to know him better before I gave him the virginity of my lips. The kiss didn't feel so special anymore. 

     When I kissed Wesley, all thought of Keaton as erased from my head. Even though the loss of feeling was only temporary, it felt good to know that it was possible to rid my feelings for the taken Keaton in some sort of way. Moving fast with Wesley had me so caught up with the pace that I could forget about him. So maybe moving fast was what I needed. Even though I don't know the least bit about Wesley, dating him could only get me to know him better. Maybe, If I give this time, I will come to find myself to like Wesley the way I like Keaton.

     Wesley pulled up to my house and leaned over, kissing my cheek. I pecked a kiss onto his lips and smiled. 

     "I'll see you Monday." I said as I got out of the car. 

     "Yeah." he smiled and ducked his head a bit so he could see me. I returned his smile with my own. "Text me, yeah?" he asked.

     "Of course." I said with a chuckle. "Goodnight." 

     "Goodnight." 

     I shut his door and he flashed me one last smile before he drove away. I walked myself to the door as a chill ran up my spine. Keaton would have walked me to the door like he did on that first night out. It was just another characteristic that made the two brothers so very different. 

     That night I laid in bed, my mind battling with thoughts. It wasn't until nearly two that I had fallen asleep, but the battles continued in my dreams. It was Keaton and Wesley who had made an appearance in my dream. I had left Wesley with high hopes that I could snatch Keaton from Sabrina and we could be the couple I've always wanted us to be. But his response to my love confession was not what I anticipated it to be. He spoke so cruel to me, he put me in my place.

     "Don't you get it, Kaylynn? I do not like you, nor will I ever. You are an idiot for thinking that I'd leave somebody as beautiful and perfect like Sabrina for you, of all people. She is beyond comparison to somebody like you. Don't talk to me anymore, I can not look at you the same." 

    I had lost both Keaton and Wesley. Maybe this dream was meant to be a message. Maybe it was trying to tell me that I should keep my feelings for Keaton to myself and let this relationship with Wesley work. I need to move on.

     I keep saying that. I keep saying that I need to forget about Keaton. I promise myself that I will, but the thought is easier than the action. The more I understand that I can't have him, the more I want him. 

     I awoke Sunday morning feeling more stressed than usual. Getting out of bed felt like more of a struggle than it really was. Today, I didn't have the motivation to do anything. Today will be the day that I lay in bed and do nothing.

     Here's to a lazy day.