Infinite Shadows

5

Pol bathed me and washed all of my cuts thoroughly, Ada and Esme staying by my side the entire time. Dean went searching all over town for the man that assaulted me, but couldn't find him anywhere. Knowing Dean, he will not stop looking until he finds the man and does his way with him. Which I do not mind. 

The rest of the night, I lay on the ground next to a burning fire.

Two blankets were tightly wrapped around my fragile body.

Everything hurt. My legs, my chest, everything. But nothing hurt as much as my mind. I was in pain. Too much.

I rested my head on my arm and scratched at the wooden floors.

"Knock, knock." I slowly turned my head and saw Arthur standing against the frame of the door.

As I looked at him, my eyes gradually became watery.

He looked at me with pity and walked into the room, silently closing the door behind him.

I turned my head back towards the fire as his footsteps came closer and closer.

I could hear the sounds of his muffled breath as he sat on the floor besides me.

We sat there in complete and utter silence, the cracks of the fire keeping the atmosphere comfortable.

"Daisy." He whispered.

I kept silent.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I could hear the quiver in his voice.

I, once again, turned my head back around to see his icy, green eyes, staring at me. His face looked hurt. His mouth was shaking. Almost as if he were about to cry.

I've never seen Arthur in such a state. He was always tough and austere.

"About what?" My voice cracked.

"Your father Daisy. Why did you hide everything?" He said as a tear rolled down his cheek.

I sat up slowly and furrowed my eyebrows.

"I... I don't know." I murmured.

He gently grabbed my chin to face me in his direction once again. I looked deep into his eyes, just like I did with Dean.

It helped lesser the pain. It was almost like reading a story. Each pair of eyes you look in, you gain knowledge. Maybe not academic knowledge, but knowledge on the person. You can learn a lot about a person through their eyes. Arthur's... they were distant. Crestfallen. Vacant.

He always showed such joyous expression in his smile whenever we would be out and about, drinking and laughing, but his eyes told a different story. They explained his torturous life and mangled heart... He was damaged. Severely.

"Your eyes... I can read them." I whisper and keep my focus deep in his mind.

"Pardon?" He says oblivious to my comment.

"You're in pain. You have been for a while now. Why? Why do you hide your pain, Arthur?"

"What are you talking about, Daisy? I'm fine." He says softly looking at the ground. 

My eyes drift to a cracking part of the ceiling that illuminates with the fires glowing light.

"Everyone says their fine, Arthur. It is so simple to hide the deepest and most daunting pain with those words. No one expects anything. It's easier to place a smile on your face then to explain everything you've been through. Because no one really cares. They act like they do, but they don't. And they never will..."

Arthur looked back up at me.

"I care."

"I care, too." I murmur. "So what's wrong. I'll listen."

"Well I-"

"Arthur," Polly walks in, interrupting Arthur from his explanation."Everyone is going to rest, for our big day tomorrow. Tommy and John are looking for you downstairs, they'd like to have one last drink."

We both look up and Arthur nods. I look at the fire and wrap myself in the blankets on the floor.

"Goodnight, love." He says and kisses my head before standing up and leaving the room, silently.

Aunt Pol walks over to me and puts her head on my shoulder.

"How are you feeling, love?"

"I'm alright. Just tired. Very tired."

"Well, Ada is just getting washed up for the night, and she'll be in here soon. Why don't we get you into bed, eh?"

I nod and use all of my strength to lift myself up. My legs were in agonizing pain, as well as my torso.

Pol lifted me gently and walked me to Ada and I's bed. I slowly climbed in and draped the blankets over my cold, fragile body.

"Goodnight, my darling Daisy. For tomorrow is a new day full of joy and family."

As Pol leaves Ada comes in.

She shuts the door behind her and places herself under the covers, facing me.

"I'm sorry this happened." She tears up.

"Don't be. It wasn't anyone's fault, but that bastard's. And my father. You have nothing to be sorry about."

"When you started running, I took the wooden spoon and started smacking your father. I called his a bastard and he soon ran away. I thought if I told you, you'd be proud."

I giggled and snuggled up to Ada.

"Oh, that makes me so incredibly proud. That arsehole deserves it after he ruined my life."

The quiet sounds of the boys downstairs soon makes up for the silence that has filled the room.

All I could do what think. Not about what happened to me, but what will happen to Ada. She was pregnant and likely going to move in with Freddie when the baby is born. I was going to miss just talking. Sharing a bed. Cuddling together. Laughing at each other's foolish ways. I was going to miss everything.

"Have you told Freddie about the baby?"

She sighs and lifts my hands, starting to play with my fingers.

"No. Not yet. But I will. Tomorrow. When he comes over."

"Ada, Tommy hates Freddie!" I whisper-scream.

"Don't worry. Tommy gave me permission to invite him over. I told him that I had an important announcement I needed to say. I'm telling everyone tomorrow."

"Oh, bloody hell, Ada. In front of everyone?" 

"Well, they're going to find out in about two months when my fucking stomach is twice the size." She drops my hand raises her voice.

Silence.

"I'm sorry..." She whispers.

"It's fine. I just... I'm scared to lose you. You're going to move into Freddie's apartment, leave me, have to grow up and mature even move, raise a child, find a way to make money." I say tensing up.

"Shhhhh... it'll be alright, Daisy. I probably am going to move in with Freddie and mature, but it's for the best. For both you and I. I mean, look at us. We sleep in the same bed for god sake. We are foolish. We have no control over ourselves. We act like little girls. We are supposed to be women. We all have to grow up eventually. Be an adult. When I leave, it will give you a chance to find yourself. Your true calling. I won't be in the way anymore. You won't be in mine either. We'll be free. We need time to be away from each other. I need to be with Freddie. I love him and he loves me. More than anything. It's time to let go of each other..."

I couldn't react. My heart had just smashed into minuscule pieces, as if it were a smashed vase on the floor. 

This hurt more than the cuts and gashes on my arms and legs. More than being assaulted. More than the pain of living.

And that is when the silence became infinite.

In my body. In my heart. In my head. 

I became numb...