Like Always [Rhett and Link]

The Almost-Kiss

GMM #850 : "Spiked Punch Challenge" (First Date Farts)

Time was on Link's side. He'd managed to stay away from the comments after they had "shipped themselves", and as the months went by he'd found it easier to think of the issue once again as nothing he needed to worry about. Certainly nothing real. And when the writers had pitched the "First Date Farts" sketch in response to a fan's question, he'd laughed along with Rhett. Link was no stranger to dressing in drag for the sake of comedy, nor was it the first time they'd play-acted as a couple. No sweat.

He just hadn't thought much about the "almost kiss" until filming began. Maybe he didn't want to psych himself out and end up looking like an idiot like he had after the plexiglass kiss in the "News Musical: Wedding Fail" episode years earlier. He didn't think he'd ever live that reaction down. So now was the time to man up and not be affected by pretending to kiss his best friend.

Link was glad he wasn't the only one with the giggles. So much for manning up. It didn't matter that the fart sounds would be added later in post -- Rhett's facial expressions and the effort it took to keep a straight face kept sending them both over the edge. And if they made it through Rhett's farts, they broke during the pregnant pause after Link's. And if they made it through the pause, well, the approach as they reached for each other...

One of the hardest parts was knowing exactly where to stop. They didn't want to get too close and actually kiss, but they had to get close enough that the viewers would think it was really going to happen before the camera cut away at the last second. If he was honest, Link knew he was the one creating most of the problem. For whatever reason, Rhett rarely seemed overly concerned with the prospect of getting intimately close to Link. He seemed to take it in stride without letting it get in his head. Link watched Rhett come in for the fake-kiss, take after take, and marveled how even in this he could keep his cool, just like always. Link was getting noticeably more rattled and giggly with each take, though, and Rhett asked the crew if they could take a break.

"Okay, man, we gotta refocus and figure this out," Rhett said when the crew had moved off to give them some space. "What do you need?"

Link shook his head. "I'm sorry, man, I don't know what's wrong with me. I've just got the giggles today."

"It's alright," Rhett said, "I'm doing it too. Let's talk it through. You seem to be struggling with the end; I think you're getting hung up on me." Link felt his heart lurch until Rhett continued. "Maybe it would be better if you imagined I was someone you would actually want to kiss. Or just focus more on getting into character, like you're just some hot chick on a date with this hot guy," Rhett smirked, "and forget you're you and I'm me. Okay?"

Link forced out a quick puff of air and shook his head, cleansing the mental palate. "Okay, man, I can do this. Sorry for being weird."

Rhett closed his hand over Link's bared shoulder. "Don't worry about it, brother! Do you want to practice a few times without the cameras running?"

"Sure, yeah, okay. Let's start after my fart." Link started to grin again but quickly sobered up. I'm not Link, he thought. I'm a girl on a date with a cute guy in a beanie. His name is...Ron, or...Don, or...

Rhett interrupted Link's internal coaching, beginning his line. "Did you just--"

Link shook his head. "Sorry, I wasn't ready. Start again."

"Okay." Rhett paused for a beat, switching back into character. "Did you just--"

"--fart?" Link jumped in, all breathy romance. "Yes."

Hold...hold...look in Rhett's eyes...no, Don's eyes...deeper...deeper...

Rhett's eyes sparkled as he ended the pause and breathed, "Yes!" Link reached for him with fluid determination, grabbed his lapel, refusing to shrink back.

You're not Link. You want him. Don't stop. It wasn't until their noses bumped together that he put on the brakes, shutting his eyes and feeling Rhett's breath across his lips for a fraction of a moment. "Again."

They ran the scene a second and third time, a fourth, a fifth. With each pause, Link found himself falling deeper into his character. You want him. He wants you. Don't stop. The last time through he had to catch himself, throwing on the emergency brake before he went too far. Rhett, as always, seemed unfazed. Link's hand was still on Rhett's lapel from the last run, his face an inch away. Link backed off as much as he could bear, still caught up in the moment, trying to come back to himself enough to keep his cool without completely losing his momentum before the cameras were back on them. "I'm ready. Let's do this."