Fairy Tales Gone Wrong

Rapunzel

Once upon a time there was a beautiful girl who was locked in a tower named Rapunzel. Rapunzel was gifted with long hair as yellow as corn. All the princes of the land wanted to marry her. When each came to climb up her hair, Rapunzel would sing in excitement. The princes' thought that was really annoying and didn't want to deal with it there whole lives, because divorces were not invented yet. So they left to find a new maiden to marry. Heartbroken Rapunzel would sit on the windowsill waiting for her true love. Until one day Rapunzel said "You know what? My price will never come. I'm gonna bust out of here myself." So she whipped her hair down the side of the tower and climbed down. She raced into the village, excited about her freedom. When she got to the village, she saw a fire breathing dragon terrorizing the town. "No, no, no, not today, not in my village," said Rapunzel. She ran to the nearest armory, took a sword, and ran back to the dragon. Rapunzel battled the scaly beast. Finally, the dragon was slayed by Rapunzel. The king came down and gave Rapunzel a million zillion dollars for her bravery. The king was so delighted, he asked Rapunzel what she wanted most. Rapunzel said she wanted a husband. So, the king gave her the ability to pick a prisoner to be her husband. Rapunzel chose Flynn Rider, who told her that his real name was Ugine. Ugine had heard about Rapunzel and liked her, so it was a happy marriage. Ugine and Rapunzel teamed up to slay all the dragons of the land. So, Rapunzel was a dragon slayer, not a princess.