boundaries;dyle

To Daniel With Love

You know you're perfect.

Just thinking of your deep, ghastly voice makes me as drunk as a sailor with a barrel of fine whiskey.
As I'm intoxicated by pure passion, I begin to pay attention at the little details of your face. The wonky tooth that you hide under the thin lips I long to touch with mine. The jawline if like to slide my finger across, just to see if blood is drawn. The wrists I wish to cradle in my hands, to kiss and nibble on. To kiss the pulse under your palms, just to make sure you're alive and here.

I'm a busy idiot, working hard in all the wrong places, and I notice that you see me staring. But my eyes are stuck like glue, and I'm not tearing away my gaze away anytime soon.

You blink once, twice, and snap your fingers in front of my eyes, and suddenly I am brought back into reality.

"What?" You ask, as my face burns with shame.

I shrug, and like a teenage girl, you've coaxed a giggle out of me.

"I'm sorry, you're... just so handsome." I spit the words out, but end the sentence with a heartfelt sigh.

You reciprocate this by pulling out a cigarette from your pocket, and light it with the little lighter in your other chapped hand.

The way you do these simple things, it's amazing. You make everything so beautiful. So salacious and sensual, even as simple as lighting your cigarette. You slip it between your lips so tastefully, as you long to inhale the addictive nicotine. The smoke clouds erupt out of your mouth, and you cough a bit, even though you're used to smoking. You don't look me in the eyes anymore, just at the table under your elbows. Your palm cradles your temple as you safely tuck your precious smoke stick back under your top lip. Now you're staring at the woman right next to us. The woman you're marrying. It breaks my heart, Daniel.

With every ounce of common sense I have, I get up and leave the table, waving a quick goodbye.

But there's remorse in this conjuring of what I believe to be common sense, so I turn back around, and I see you.

I see you put your arms around her waist, and plant a kiss that grows into those elicit, public, displays and eventually a tumble in the back seat of the car.

And so I turn, and as fast as I can, I run.