Hi. My name is (insert super basic name here) I go to east high school, and I am bullied by a mean, popular girl named LaQuandeayishea. Right now I'm sitting in the cafeteria al by myself, listening to a really emo band that I think is cool. Just then, a tall, blonde, handsome boi walks in to the cafeteria. I've never seen him before in my lyfe.
"dAANANAG BOI YOU HOT YOU GOT A BAE OR NAH'' I blurt, making him stare at me.
He strides over to me and sits down next to meh.
"Hi." I say quitely, staring into his beautiful blue orbs like the black sea.
''Aye." he says, making my stomach flutter with butterfiles. literally. For lunch I ate a few caterpillars. Hopefully I won't become a giant butterfli becuz people say that you are what you eat.
"Ur really pretty." He says, touching my arm. His touch sends a shock through my body, making me spazz out and do the harlem shake in my stomach.
"ouhyfiuwdhciwudhcnxiwduhcxiuhw9efuyhr8g7t487r." I say as he smiles at me, his teeth whiter than a toilet seat.
Just then, LaQuandeayishea walks in, grabbing the boys shulder.
"Back off (insert name here) he's mine!!!11!1" She says ferociously like a kitten.
I start to cry, running into the bathroom. I can't live anymore1!1!!11! I look at myself in the mirror, my winged eyeliner a mess.
"oH NO" I scream, quickly applying 54 more coats of the black makeup.
When I'm ready, I run into the ugly green stall and bring out a sharp knife. I know what I need to do.
I pull a McDonalds hashbrown out of my back pocket, cutting it with the knife and eating it slowly. My last meal before I flush myself down the toilet forever.
" oMGZ i'm so ugly. nobody likes me." I sob as I continue to devour my amazing hashbrown.
Once I'm done, I put both of my legs into the tolielt, my studded, skulled combat bootz getting wet, ready to end my terrible life as I know it.
As soon as I'm about to flush, the mysterious boi walks in, screaming.
"NO DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH, (INSERT NAME HERE)"
"OMG YOU SAVED ME, EUGENE!" I say, hopping out of the toilet.
"My name's Tyler, but okay!"
I run over to him and almost tackle becuz im so in luv.
"EWWW TOLIET WATER GUH-ROSE!!1!!1!!" he shouts.
"OH IM SOO SOORRI!!!11!1!!!!!" i say apolejeticcaly as my chheks turn firetruck red or maybe that is just the blush i put on this morning.
"actually don't woory about it" he flashes me a tootHy grin
HIS SMILE. I AM IN MCDONALS HEAVAN!!!!!1!!!
as soon as i realize that im sitting on him, i get up becuz im such a fat pig.
"thank you SO much for saving me!"
again he gives me that prince charming toilet white smile.
"i luh you gurl. i ain't eva gonna stop lovin you, girl."
wow. he's so romantic.
"i think wii should get murried' i say.
"maybe laytur." Eugene says, making me smile.
"KK." I say softly.
