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Name: Atticus Rigby
Age:21 Years old
Siblings:
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Excerpt:
"You – you have no idea, what it was like for me and I – you don't deserve them Atticus."
"It's not – they're mine-"
"God! They aren't puppies," I grit out.
"You think they're yours because they share your DNA? That's all that makes them yours?"
"You're nothing to them... and I don't want them around you. I don't want them in your life."
"You have no idea what it's like," I shake my head - frustrated - slowly, he didn't know or understand it, "I'm afraid to tickle Shiloh," I put my fear out there. "I'm afraid, to tickle her, because over excitement messes with her arrhythmia. God, she has an arrhythmia!"
"I'm afraid that her heart will over do itself if I tickle her, make her breathless, cut off the oxygen in her body because her heart isn't built for that. I – we never – try to scare her because her heart racing won't be funny, it'll lead to her struggling to breath."
"You took your daughter home – like I said – but when I finally took Shiloh home, I didn't sleep. I couldn't sleep. I was afraid I would go to sleep and she would d-die."
"And have you ever watched your daughter, listening to her breath and think, oh god what a miracle..." I think back to when I first brought Shiloh home, "I couldn't think that because, all I could think about was is she hurting? Is it hard for her to breath? Is she getting enough oxygen? Why? Because she couldn't speak, she couldn't even voice if something was wrong. So I didn't sleep when I brought her home, and even then she was susceptible to infections."
"When she was just over five months old, there was a bug going around, her immune system isn't like what it should be, so when I caught the bug, I had to live in hotel for a week because I was terrified that I'd give her something. She's ahead of all her milestones even though she was this tiny little thing. She's learning to read, and I think it's purely to spite me in her own way because taking away her story time is the harshest punishment I can fathom giving her because I don't-" I stop, I never say the words aloud.
"You don't deserve them, and sharing DNA doesn't always mean you are what's best for the child... if you weren't the one to send the papers, it didn't matter to someone close to you and I don't want them in my daughters life either. And I get to say that, I get to say who I want around them because do you know how hard it is to no be able to do something to help your daughter? To be physically unable to help them?" Silvia, wipes her face, but remains silent and when I see her doing so my anger grows.
"And you want to know why else I think you don't deserve to be in their life, or mine?"
He doesn't answer me, and I focus on Silvia, "Did he tell you about me?" I wait a moment before I clarify, "When I came in for the interview? Did he tell you before hand that he knew me?" I ask Silvia, my heart hurting in a whole new way. When she doesn't answer, it's like she did anyways, and I just shake my head at Atticus, "You vanished from my life, you ignored me, don't return any of my calls and you thought the best - possible - place for you to pop back in is in an interview I've been working towards my whole life?"
"You're selfish." And I don't think truer words had ever been spoken.
